i'm sorry for that last chapter but at the same time i'm not.
oh lol thanks for 3k reads
here's another one but it's not as sad lol
no characters/art/photos belong to me.
dory for spelling/grammar mistakes.
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episode 11-
after they get back from camp-
"good night." ukai waved to the teenage boys as he left the gym. he could finally go home and rest. and think about what happened yesterday. it seemed like a blue. like a bad fever dream. he didn't want it to be real but he knew it was.
he opened his apartment door to be greeted by the empty space. he's never been one for to many decorations or even furniture for that matter but it just seemed bare and boring now. he sat his bag down by the door and stocked over to the bathroom.
he felt sick to his stomach thinking about tomorrow and the next day. he felt sick to his stomach thinking about how'll it'd effect the boys if they lost. he felt sick to his stomach knowing that the man he loves doesn't feel the same. or won't say he does.
i can't do this.
those words played on a loop in his brain since last night. weighing him down. making him feel like shit. it's not takedas fault he doesn't love him. it's not even ukais fault. these thoughts overwhelmed the fake blond.
he tunred on the faucet and looked down at the running water. takeda had told him so much over this past week. maybe it was the fear of him knowing these things about him. or once again it was just unrequited feelings. he didn't want this pain of loving someone who doesn't love him back.
he's had this kind of love before. but nothing like this. nothing like this one love. he truly was something ukai never thought he'd get. or even have half a chance with.
he quickly splashed his pale skin with the cold water and before he knew it tears were forming in his eyes. it's surprising how he was able to keep such a good composer today but like everything it must come to an end.
he laid himself down on his couch after setting the grueling 4am alarm. the almost silent apartment drew something from the young man. it drew the pain he'd pushed down for so long from past relationships. from past feelings. it was all becoming clear to him.
yes he loves takeda. and nothing can change that. but takeda doesn't love him. so he can live with these feelings. never act on them. but he must live with them. till they go away or until someone comes and changes his whole perspective on love.
as takeda opened his front door he felt the usual sense of anxiety. this apartment has always brought levels of anxiety for him. either because of stress from work that he brought home. past friends. family members. relationships. this apartment net sat right with him.
the sound of the silence of his apartment drew him closer to his emotions. before he knew it tears were streaming down his face. he of course wanted to be with ukai. but he was scared. he was scared the he would leave him like everyone else has. he was scared of comitment. he was scared of love.
the sound of someone knocking on takeda's front door interrupted his deep thoughts. he slowly emerged from the couch and answered the door. outside stood the ukais ex. she was wearing what seemed to be night clothes. revealing. but night clothes.
"did he do it?"
what. did who do what? she could easily read my expression so she talked once again. "did ukai..ya know?" oh that. she could see the tears still falling from his eyes. his puffy red cheeks. the look of sadness painted across his pale skin. "what happened?" she pulled him into a close hug as he continued to sob on her shoulder.
after he had calmed down a bit they sat down on the couch and he decided to tell her what happened.
"i love him. it's as simple and easy as that. but yet..i turned him down. i guess the pain and sorrow that i've been carrying around for so long finally caught up to me and decided to take away something i really wanted. i really wanted..i mean i really want him. but i already hurt him with me turning him down i'm not just gonna take that back. it shouldn't and doesn't work that way! and now i feel like absolute shit because i want to love him but..i'm scared."
he ranted. finally he finished and took a deep breath to calm himself down. she was clearly shocked from what she had just heard but she felt a feeling that there is more to this whole story. "takeda. he loves you. you love him. maybe there was a relationship in the past where they played with your emotions. now that relationship haunts you?" he nodded slowly in response.
"i really don't have good advice but..if you love him. you need to get him. you can't just wait around until it's convenient for you. or for him. you just need to do it." she patted the raven-haired mans back.
"just please takeda. tell him you love him. don't play with his or your emotions."
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it's short but whatever.
i probably won't update for another few days just because i put out 3 chapters in less that 2 days? i think it was so yee
random thing...it's what it's is grammatically correct...let that sink in...okay bye
yes it will end happily😉
