I turned back around to face the direction I had just come from. It wasn't too late. I could still turn back and go home where everything would be fine, normal. I took a deep breath letting the fresh spring air fill my lungs. No. I had to do this. I had to get the answers I so desperately sought. Staring down the long, dirt path that led to the highway, my crappy car parked on the side of the road, it all looked miles away. I felt a pressure in my chest. Could I really do this? I clenched both my hands into fists and turned back to face what I had been avoiding, avoiding for far too long.
The giant, black, circus tent was hung high, almost too high for me to see. Where all tents that high and I had just never noticed before? No. They weren't. Because this tent was different. This tent held the answers I needed. I slowly walked towards the opening. I took notice of how there was no caravans or anything out here in this deserted field. There was nothing but the tent and I. I cast one last glance behind me, at the highway I so longed to run back to, back to civilisation. I held my breath as I pulled the thick, velvet curtains across and stepped inside.
The air changed. It was thick and murky. I couldn't help but cough uncontrollably as it hit my lungs. Everything was dark, the only light coming from behind me as I let the curtains sweep past me. Closing off the outside world. There was no light. I was lost in the darkness. The tent smelt horrible, like dry, cut hay that you'd find on a farm. I blinked a few times letting my eyes adjust to the darkness. I could make out shadows in the distance. People maybe? But my gut told me otherwise. There were no people here, not in a place like this. Something scutter past my feet so quickly I jumped. I hoped it was a rat of some sort. But it was too heavy. It almost felt like a child.
"I knew you'd come." A strong voice echoed through the tent. It was stern and female. My eyes dashed across my surroundings, trying to find where the voice came from.
"I didn't have much of a choice." I called out to the dark. I noticed movements in the corner of my eye and that's when I saw them. The Freaks. I could just make out their silhouettes. A bearded woman, a tiny man with three legs, a tall, muscular fellow with a long moustache and a set of heads who appeared to share a body. Most people would have felt uneasy by their appearances but that wasn't what made me stare at them, my eyes wide and unbelieving. They all stood there in the shadows of the tent, but their eyes...all of them were glowing this deep yellow, like a lightbulb that was too old. They watched me intensely as a sense of deja vu hit me. I'd seen those eyes before.
"Mr Charles Bailey," that voice called again as a spotlight appeared in the centre of the tent, where the ring master would perform tricks with animals. The sound was so harsh and bold that I couldn't help but jump. There in the centre stood a woman, tall and slim. Her jet black hair rolled up so it sat as a high bun atop of her head, it was pulled so tightly that her features looked even more intimidating. She wore a deep violet dress with ruffles that reminded me of something a woman from the eighteen hundreds would've worn. She stood there with her hands neatly folded in front of her, her expression like that of a doll. She didn't blink, her wide, grey eyes looked dead.
"Welcome home." She said with a cruel smile that never reached her eyes. Her gaze never left mine, and she still didn't blink. She may have been standing at least fifteen feet away from me but her presence made me feel uncomfortable.
"This isn't my home." I retorted as I slowly found myself walking towards her, the Freaks glowing eyes watching my every step. She cocked her head at my response, her grey eyes seemed to get even more wide.
"But of course it is," she said as her gaze lowered to the ground. I continued walking towards her, my steps growing slower and slower as I approached the ring.
"You've been having the dreams." She said with her head still lowered. I stopped dead in my tracks. How could she know about that?
"I think of them more as nightmares." I said as I noticed the Freaks seemed to double in size. Before I only counted about eight and now there seemed to be at least twenty, all surrounding the ring but remaining in the shadows. The woman's head remained down. Everything seemed to have frozen. You could hear a pin drop. I waited for some kind of movement, my breathing increased as my palms got sweaty. I knew this was a bad idea and yet I still came. Why? Because apparently I'm an idiot. The entire tent filled with maniacal laughter as the woman's head shot up, she was looking me dead in the face, laughing. Her eyes remained wide and open as her mouth was grinning, revealing her stained, yellow teeth. I couldn't help but watch and wait to see what happened next.
I might die here, a voice said in my head. I pushed the thought aside and attempted to take a few steps away from he woman who was still laughing like I had just said the funniest joke, but as I stepped back I bumped into something hard. I slowly turned around to see a clown towering over me. He was at least seven foot compared to my measly five seven. His once bright, rainbow afro was now a dull mix of browns with the occasional red or yellow thrown in, his face paint looked cracked and worn, like it was painted on him weeks ago. The dark triangles around his eyes were black and smudged, making his glowing, yellow eyes all the more prominent. He looked down at me with an expressionless look. I took the opportunity to study his eyes up close, well, as close as I could be from down here. There was no pupil, just one bright orb of light, watching me, judging me, looking into my soul. I swallowed so hard it hurt.
I might die here, that voice said again, and this time I was starting to believe it. The clown then opened up his painted, sad mouth and started laughing as well, just as manically as the woman was. I felt lightheaded all of the sudden, like someone had let all the air out of the tent. I blinked a few times trying to keep my vision clear. I turned back to face the woman who was still laughing, her grin appeared to have grown inhumanly wide as her grey eyes lit up in a honey, golden glow. The spotlight in the centre of the ring seemed to be fading, leaving me alone in the dark with these Freaks. I reached out to grab onto something, anything, but I was just grabbing air. I fell on my face, hard. I tasted the dirt I was under but also a bitter, metallic flavour. I was bleeding. I rolled onto my back as spotlight faded out, the laughter dying down with it. I closed my eyes, hoping, praying, I'd wake up in my own bed. Dread filled my body as I felt eyes watching me.
I took a deep breath and slowly opened them to find at least twelve pairs of glowing eyes on me. I could no longer make out the features as to who they belonged to. It was just me and the Freaks, in the darkness. The eyes all appeared to get closer to me, like I was moving up towards them but I knew better than that. They were leaning down towards me, watching me so intensely I could feel my heart pumping against my chest. I let my eyes roll into the back of my head , giving in to the overwhelming urge to sleep. The last thing I heard was a childs voice singing "We won't let you go, again."
