Girl Love

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to the god that I have not met yet

my heart beats harder than you could ever allow. 


would you still allow me to say grace

while her name dances on the tip of my tongue

or with her lipstick staining my lips 


I don't even know who you are yet

but I know who she is


god, will you let me love her? 


my palms  sweat

not just when your eyes watch over our every move

they tremble when her fingers interlock with mine


why are you always watching?

why are you the one trying to hide?


I know that you are waiting

for my repent; to turn around and change,


but God, if you are the one that made me,

then you know damn well that I will not go back---

who I am is here to stay.


she holds my hand in prayer

as I wash out your name, 

with someone that will love me more. 

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