To Angèle...

Life in quarantine

Part 1: Dua's POV

•Dear diary,

It's been a month. I'm bored as hell. Living with Anwar has been fun, but so far all he's been doing is playing his stupid videos games. He wants me to try them, but I really think there are far better things to do during this time, but who knows, maybe I'll give it a go? The problem with him is that he's nice and all, but we just don't connect. He doesn't hug me or go on dates with me except for when he wants something from me. It's never me, it's all him! But what choice do I have, ever since i broke up with Isaac for the second time I've been so alone and Anwar was there for me and helped introduce me to the world of fashion-mainly through his sisters though.

Anwar then shouts from across the room, "Duaaaaaa come here baby, I wanna show you my dragon on Warcraft!"

He's just so insufferable, but at least he calls me baby.
•

I'm into month four of lockdown now! It's been so long and I'm getting fed up of staying at home. Except it isn't even my home.

I'm currently in a b&b since my apartment is flooded. It's only down the road but I miss it more than anything right now. Even though it may not be all that much or even that big, it still gives me some peace and comfort, especially as i'm alone most of the time. Now i feel like an animal locked up in a cage far away from home, even if it's just down the street. Anwar is still not giving me the time of day, just computer games here and music in his bedroom that. Yes, we even have separate bedrooms! I mean, how are we even considered dating when the last time his kissed me was months ago on the red carpet.

•

Finally, the restrictions have been lifted! It's eight months into quarantine and finally, I can do things that I want to without fearing the police turning up at my front doorstep. A few weeks back I moved into my flat again, and this time Anwar and I had to share a room for a while, as our spare bedroom is still messed up by the flooding. My manager has sent me this song by a Belgian singer. She's called Angèle, and honestly  she's got the most angelic voice i've ever heard. I think she'd be the perfect partner for me.
I mean to write songs with! not.. not in that way at all. I mean she's beautiful don't get me wrong but i'm not.. i'm not that way inclined.

•

It's been a few weeks and i've not heard anything from Angele yet, but i hope she's just busy or something. You know who isn't busy? ME!
I'm absolutely completely and utterly BORED out of my mind and on top of that- I'm ill! How is that even possible when i've barely been outside my house for the past eight months! However, all of these mixed emotions have gotten me working on some new lyrics and honestly, there's one song that's really coming together. I think it could work.

Anwar decided that we should adopt a dog, Dexter. He's adorable don't get me wrong, but I'm not sure if it's the best idea especially with lockdown pretty much coming to an end. However, I do enjoy taking him for long walks through London everyday and finding things I hadn't before. Sometimes Anwar comes with me but he mostly stays at home all day.

I left my house at about 11 in the morning to take Dex for a walk yesterday, and as I was walking to a cute little cafe on the outskirts of London I saw none other than my ex, Isaac Carew. He was with a woman but she looked at least 15 years older than him. They didn't seem to do much except grab a cup of coffee and a croissant- talking occasionally but mostly sitting in a comfortable silence. He was still just as handsome as he was a few years ago when we broke up for the second time, with his thick luscious brunette hair and ocean green eyes. His almost resembles Elvis with his high cheekbones and strong nose.

I miss the way his hands would hold my waist and they way he'd smile at me when he woke up laying next to me in bed. I miss the smell of the food he'd cook every evening, and the beautiful walks we'd take whenever the spring air turned to summer.

Our relationship was perfect whilst it lasted, and I often question why we ever broke up.