The music was so loud! Many drunk people are dancing on the dance floor, "you want another shot? You already drank too much," Like I care though. "Just give me what I want okay!" The bartender just nodded at me and he served me another glass of bourbon.
"You seemed pretty drunk pretty boy," a guy sat beside me. "He did, drink a lot sir," he smiled at me, his smile is so bright. It's so pure.
"WHY DO YOU CARE! I CAN DO WHAT EVER I WANT!" With that I almost fall to the floor gladly this guy caught me, "okay I'm bringing you home, where do you live?"
I told him my address and he drove me home, and I passed out on the driver's seat.
I woke up in me and Jason's room, stinging pain struck my head. "What the fuck happened last night?" I stood up from the bed, and the clock points at noon. Wait.... Noon!?
"Oh fuck!" I quickly went to the bathroom and cleaned since I looked like a fucking mess, I dressed up and ran to my work.
There's traffic today, so good thing I run to today. I got to my work and when I got there, their eyes are piercing right through me.
A co-worker went to me, while holding a cup of iced coffee and she poured it unto me.
"What did I do?!" She just laughed at me, "that's what you get! Mr. Jason got punched last night because of you fag!" And she pushed me to the ground, and some of my colleagues ran to help get me beaten up.
"Enough!" They we're stopped, I stood up and faced, Jason's grandmother. "What did you do to my poor boy? Huh!?" I couldn't answer her, since I know nothing. "Tell me. What. Did. You. Fucking. Do!" She slapped me on my face.
I was filled with rage, I've kept all my anger for so long, that I lost control of myself, I slapped her back and strangled her neck, "s-stop! Release me!"
I get the cutter from my desk and I pointed at her, "don't you you all fucking dare, or I will cut this bitch's head off!" Suddenly I was pulled back, releasing her and I got punched by, Jason.
"Don't you dare hurt my gran faggot!" The security brought me to the ground floor of the building and they threw me to the ground and threw my belongings to me.
Pain,pain is everywhere, I think it is where my life started and will end. I stood up from the ground carefully not to fall back, and I walked until I got to my home. The whole day was embarrassing, all of the people that I had seen has been looking at me.
Once I got home, I locked the door and cried and cried. Why am I like this? Maybe all of this started because of Jason. I need to cut him out of my life, but I can't, yeah I'm fucking dumb, but he's the person that I love, he's the only thing I have left.
And with out him, I'm left with nothing, I am always left with nothing! I cried and cried and until I couldn't cry further, I'm too tired from crying, that I slept on the floor.
I woke up with someone knocking on my door, I stood up to see who it was. I opened it and it was Jason, I hugged him. "I'm sorry Jason, I'm really sorry I promise that won't happen again!"
"I'm sure that won't happen again cause, I'm leaving." What, he-he is leaving? Tears starting to flow from my eyes, stream after stream. Jason didn't even bother to look at me and he just went straight into our room.
I crippled unto the floor crying, and when Jason went out of the room, "no! Please don't leave me here! I beg you!" I hugged his legs. "Can't you see you're pathetic and helpless, I couldn't stand you!" He swayed me off of his legs and he went out.
I cried and cried and cried. I can't empty my mind of thoughts on how can I live without him.
I can't end my life, I'm afraid of death. I just cried and cried until I am better. I went to my room and cleaned up and put some band-aids on the wound on my face.
Maybe if I drink, I might have the time to forget about him. I changed to my casual and clothes and headed to a bar. The same bar where I went to the last time.
When I got there I ordered to the bartender, "ay, you're here to drink a lot again mate?" He asked while wiping glasses. "Definitely need a lot of alcohol today." I sounded really monotone.
He offered me one glass of tequila and I downed it in one go. "Whoa! Whoa! Slow down pretty boy," a guy with a really bright smile sat beside me. "Sorry, but do I know you?" He smiled at me, "you don't remember me huh?" I shook my head, "It's better if you didn't remember me, I'm Ian by the way." "Ethan, Ethan Vance."
Whoa! I'm getting dizzy and I'm at my fourth glass of tequila, "don't drink a lot like last night, or I might get in trouble with you husband again." He smiled at me.
He's the reason why Jason left me! I quickly punched him, which makes all the people around us stop dancing and watched at us. "You're the fucking reason why he left me!!" The loud music kinda dulls down my voice.
He stood up and dragged me to the back alley of the building, he grabbed me by my collar. "What is wrong with you!" I'm crying again, "he left me because of you! I don't know what you did, but you ruined my life!" His grip loosen and I slumped to the ground.
"I-I'm sorry, how can I pay you?" I looked at him, this dick tried to bribe me with money!? "I don't want your fucking money!" I pushed him and I ran to go out of this alleyway but the road is badly lit and I tripped at one on the pipes. That was painful.
"Are you okay?" He asked. "Why does everyone keep questioning if you're okay, but in fact they can see that you're not!" He looked confused. " What?" What the fuck came out of my mouth. "I'm fine," He caress my legs and I winced at one point that he touched. "I'll carry you to my car."
He lifted me up carefully so I won't hurt my leg further, he laid me inside his car and drove me to my home.
I kept crying inside the car, "did he hurt you?" He asked but still keeping an eye on the road. "Yes." More tears flowed from my eyes.
"You know what, you can move on from him, it just need time." He smiled, I slept in the car. I'm tired from crying too much.
********
I woke up in my room, alone. The whole room feels empty, it lose it's life when Jason left.
I stood up and headed to the kitchen, Ian is sleeping on the couch. I prepared food for him and I. "Good morning. How are you feeling?" Ian sat at the table waiting for the food.
"I'm feeling better, but I need to get used to live alone from now on." I smiled. "You're ex is such an asshole from the first time I met him, from college." Wait, did he say college?
"Did we went to the same college?" I asked. "You've really forgotten about me. I'm that nerdy kid that helped you from falling from the ladder while you are hanging banners," I remembered him now.
It was foundation day of the university, we were tasked to hang banners around the campus for the celebration. I remembered his nerdy look, but now he looked different, he got hot to be honest.
I've been staring at him for too long, "h-here" I placed his meal on the table and he munched down on it. "This is delicious! You're a really good cook." I smiled at his compliments.
I remembered to take the ring that I had on my finger, Ian noticed that I took off my ring. "We need to get rid of it, it will help you move on." Tears starting to flow again from my eyes.
"I-I can't," he stood up and hugged me. "If you're not ready to move on then, start from square one, hide the ring." We went to the bedroom and he opened on of the drawers, "put it right there," I put it there, "we can come back to it, if you're ready to move forward and leave all the painful memory behind."
I smiled. "Thank you Ian."
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