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CHAPTER 5

“So what did they say?” . “We’re going to do some other tests, if there isn’t any risk she will do the operation. The doctor said that we were lucky that we found out this early. If we would be just a little bit late then it would be hard for her.” -I was talking with Eva about her moms condition. It’s been four days since that day that me and Cole went out. Today was a rainy Wednesday. I called Eva to tell her about the new things that we learned cause I didn’t want her to be left behind and then we talked about everything that she missed from not being here. “She will make it, don’t worry. But you have to be strong too, okay? You have to be strong, for her and for you. And don’t forget to tell me about what the doctor says. I will be there with you when the operation happens.” . “Thank you, Lissa “ . “Don’t worry. Oh, the lesson is about to start. I’ll call you again. Bye.” . “Bye.” -After that the lesson started. I was concentrating more then usually cause later today I have to work with Cole. Even though he is really smart and I don’t that he needs help. I’ve seen him just once in the morning and in the second lesson he said the he needs to be somewhere and left the lesson. I hope that everything is alright.

Cole’s POV

I knew that something was going to happen. I wasn’t surprised at all. It’s like a routine. Every time when I’m feeling fine, when I’m relaxed, something bad happens. Bad luck is always behind me.
Today in the morning I woke up with this gut. I got ready for school and as I went there I saw Lissa.
I was scared to speak to her so I just took out my books and went at the class.
When the second lesson was about to start, I took a call from one of the persons that I never would like to see, and now that he called I knew that something happened and I had to go there. I didn’t want to but, who cares about what I want? I saw Lissa and told her that I need to be somewhere and left the class. I felt bad for talking like that to her, but I think that she understood that something’s going on.
I took my car and first decided to go home so I can change my outfit. I don’t want them to get angry from my clothes so…
After I got ready, I told my driver to sent me to the mansion and we went there.
“Nice of you to come at your home son” -I heard mom. “Hi mom. How are you?” -She’s fine for the moment, until she has everything that she wants. “I’m fine darling. What about you? How’s school going? Do you have any problem there? If so, tell your dad then we can call the principal and talk with him.” . “No need mom. Everything is just fine.” -I looked around but there was no one. “Where’s dad?” -I asked mom. “He’s in his study waiting for you.” . “Thanks.” -Just as I was about to go mom called me. “Yes mom?” . “Please don’t make him angry. Do whatever he wants.” -How can she ask something like that from me? Am I a robot or what? It hurts me when they show it that they don’t care at all. “Don’t worry, I will not.” -I told her and went to where dad is.
As I was walking I looked at the place where I was supposed to live at, the place where I feel like I’m in a prison not a home. I looked at pictures in the wall. I looked at the reason why I stayed here until two years ago. Now she isn’t here so I don’t have a reason to stay anymore.
When I went to his study, I knocked and waited. “Come in.” -Here. That’s the voice that I used to love before but now it’s the voice that hate the most. I despise it.
I opened the door and went inside. “You called me.” -I told him. “I’m fine thanks. What about you?” -I just wanted to finish as fast as I could and go far from this place. “Fine.” . “I’m glad. Now sit, I have something to talk with you.” -I sat and waited for him to go on. “How were the first exams?” -He asked. “I passed them all.” . “That’s good to hear. It means that you’re working, for real.” -I knew what he wanted to do but I will not react. That’s what he wants from me. “Yeah. So you called me because?” . “Oh yeah. A friend of mine wants to open one of his hotels in Spain so he wants someone that he can trust to go there and to look at how things are going on. He told me to go but I have a lot of work to do so, we decided to sent you there. In the same time you can look at how things like this work  , so you can learn more. After all you’re my only child so I have to give everything to you. Don’t think that I forgot about your promise. “I didn’t forget too.” -I was the one who made it so how could I? “About this hotel. When should I go there? I have to give some projects this week, then I have exams and I don’t want to miss them, which is why I will not.” . “I’ll talk with him again about when. For the moment I think that you can go after your exams.” -I nodded. “Anything else?” -I asked him. “In front of you is your father, so you can at least show some respect. I’m trying for you here.” -The father card again. “You lost that name for me two years ago, so don’t wait anything like that from me. As for you trying, then you should try more. And how about first asking me then decide? You think I don’t know that you told him that I’ll go, do you? Well you know what? I know you , that’s why I can wait everything from you.” -I had a lot of things to tell him but, I don’t want to spent any time here. “Be careful boy. If you know me, that means that you also know what I can do to you.” . “Trust me, I do.” -I told him. He showed that to me two years before so how could I not know? “If there’s nothing more then, I’ll go.” -I got up. “Oh and one thing, please don’t call when I’m at school. We don’t want to leave the class for no reason right?” -and I went out. I was feeling so suffocated here, I have to go out. “Cole.” -Mom called me. “Mom. I have lesson please we can talk in another day.” . “I called the principal and told him that you can’t go there today.” -What? No she didn’t. “Why mom?” . “Cause I want to spent some time with my son. You never come here. And I wanted to ask something from you.” . “To ask something from me? When did you ever asked me mom? You just tell me to do it, the both of you. And why would you want to spent time with your son when you’re not even my real mom. You want to spent time with your son, the one that you never stopped abusing. The son that you hated the most, oh sorry you still do. So why now? Because she’s not here. Because she wasn’t a fool like me, she wasn’t a coward like me. And because she was your real daughter and she’s the one that both of you loved. So no, I came here cause he called me not you. And guess what? He ‘asked’ something from me too. That’s the only thing that you can do after all.” -I went out as fast as I could and went to my car. I hated them. I hated all of them. And I also despise myself cause I can’t hate her. “Where to sir?” -the driver asked me. “Home. And can you please call me by my name?” -he was older then me and he still calls me Sir. I wonder why. Cause that shit of my dad tells not just to him but everyone to don’t call me by my name. Why? Cause they work for me. What kind of a bullshit was that? I knew that he never would ask me. But of course the stupid mind of mine thought that maybe, maybe he would.
I went home and then I saw at the clock, the lessons have finished two hours ago. Suddenly Lissa came in my mind. What is she doing? Will she come tonight? I don’t think she will. I actually wanted to find a reason I could spent more time with her, that’s why I told her to come and teach me. Even though I know everything, still I could do some rechecks right? Now we have this project to finish too, so that means more time for me to spent with her. I actually don’t know what she sees in me. How isn’t she afraid to talk with me. As I was thinking about her, I heard the bell meaning that someone came. I put on a new shirt and went to look at who came.
I opened the door and was met with a smiling Lissa. “Hello there. I hope you didn’t forget about our working session.” -she told me. “I never would forget about it. Come inside.” - And just like that she managed to make me smile without trying to. I was glad that she came. “Did you have dinner?” . “No actually I didn’t.” . “Do you want to die from the hunger or what?” -she has to look after herself. “I forgot. I had some things to do and didn’t have enough of time to eat.” -What did she have to do that she forgot to feed herself. “Okay then. I’m going to order some food and then we can work.” -she nodded at me. “Is there anything you would like to order or should I just order anything?” . “Whatever you want, no problem for me.” -she told me while she was taking out her books. “Should we take some Chinese food then?” . “That would be great.” -she said smiling at me. Okay then. I took out my phone and ordered. After that I went in the living room and saw Lisa doing something in her notebook. She was so concentrated in writing that she didn’t even see me. While I was looking at her, I studied every part of her. She was indeed beautiful. While I was smiling as a freak at her I decided to break the silence and went by her side. “You already started?” . “No I was just taking some notes of what we learned today so I can sent them to Eva.” -she was such a nice friend to her. “It’s good that you’re helping her even though you have enough of things to do.” . “Yeah but I don’t care. I just hope that her mom will get better so she can come back.” . “Everything’s going to be good. Don’t worry.” . “Easier said then done.” . “You’re right but we have to keep our hopes. After all isn’t that one of the things that makes us to keep trying?” . “Yeah, you’re right. Thanks.” . “No need to thank me.” -I said to her. “Now, should we start?” . “Yeah, come on.” -And so we started doing our project. We didn’t have a lot left so when the food came we already finished. We just had to finish our speeches and everything will be totally done. 


Lissa’s (POV)

“That was so good. Thank you.” -We just finished eating. I didn’t eat anything since morning and yeah, I was really hungry. I even ate all of my plate, it was so good. “I’m glad that you liked it.” . “Trust me, I loved it.” -we didn’t have that much to do now. So we I decided to tell Cole what he missed today. I saw guilt in his eyes but I knew that something important happened and that’s why he went out like that. I wanted to tell him that I wasn’t hurt or anything. “Spit it out.” -I said to him. “What?” -he asked me. “I see that you want to say something, so whatever it is say it. Don’t worry I will not judge.” -he looked confused but then his eyes softened and told me everything. From the moment when he left the school to when he went to meet his parents and what they talked about. I’m glad that he trusted me now. That’s why I know that I can trust him too. I saw pain in his eyes, and my heart was hurting for him too. “Well I don’t think that’s a big deal if you look it in a bright way.” -I told him. “How?” -he asked. “Okay. First you have to go to Spain right?” . “Yeah.” . “Well lucky you, I live there too. That means I can come with you, you know if you want to.” -I’ve been thinking to go after the exams. “Really? I would be really glad if you could come.” . “I hope so. Oh and there is something else too.” . “Enlighten me.” -Oh I will. “You will have a big responsibility when you go there right? So you’re going to go there and show them what you can do. You’re going to show them what Cole can do. And you can call me anytime you want when you go there, also we can go on with our lessons. Now that I think about it, I have to make plans of where we have to go and visit.” -I was starting to get excited. “You’re really, I don’t know. You’re so different.” . “Different in a good meaning I hope.” . “Hahahah, yeah.” -I managed to make him laugh finally. But still I could see doubt in his eyes. “You know what Cole?” -I asked him. “I can’t say that I understand it, I understand you, cause I don’t. It would be a lie if I say something like that. But at least I know that it sucks. I do know that it isn’t a really good feeling. And I also can say that I will try to be there for you. I know that you don’t like to show your feelings, like I get it. But I’m glad that when you’re with me, you’re you. You’re Cole. I’m happy that you can trust me, which is also why I trust you. So don’t worry, I’ll try to be there for you, for as long as you want me to.” -I don’t want him to hate his parents. I can see it that they made something before but, everyone makes mistakes right? We make mistakes and learn from them. Isn’t it what everyone says? I’ve done mistakes too.  And I will always regret that I did them. But at least now I’m trying to don’t repeat them. “I do trust you Lissa. I don’t know why but believe me when I say that I trust you. Also, thank you. But I would like to don’t talk about it anymore. Thank you for saying that to me. I appreciate it. I also want you to know that I’ll be there for you too.” -I smiled at him. That’s enough for now. I will not push him. Cause I know how hard it is to talk about your problems. “Okay then. Let’s finish this page and that will be enough for today.”
After that we finished with our work and I went back at the dorm. I talked with mom and when I asked her about dad again she said that there is nothing new. It’s been almost three months since I didn’t talk with him, since he fell in that deep sleep, it’s been a long time. I don’t know how much I can take, it’s hard. I’m trying to keep myself with good memories and stuff but still, how long am I going to keep doing it? I’m trying but again there are some times when it’s hard to keep doing so.
While I was thinking about everything that happened until now, the tears started running down. And that’s how I went to sleep. I just hope that tomorrow will be a good day cause I know that I will not.

I woke up late, so that means I was going to be late for the first period too. The exams are going to start the next two weeks so I shouldn’t be late. Also I have to call Eva and ask her about her moms operation. Ugh, I feel like I’m dying. I took a quick shower, put my clothes on and put some makeup. Last night I couldn’t sleep that well and now I looked like a zombie. I tried to be as fast as I could.
When I went at school I stopped for one minute so I could take some air. I couldn’t control my ragged breathing from the run that I just did. Okay Lissa, come on. You have a long day ahead of you. After some minutes the bell ringed meaning that the first lesson ended. Shit what should I do now?
“Lissa!” -I heard someone calling me. “Lissa? What happened? Why are you late? Is everything okay?” -Oh, it was Cole. “Nothing didn’t happen and everything is okay. I just forgot to put on my alarm and so I woke up late.” -I didn’t want to talk. “Cole the second period is about to start. See you later.” -He was surprised and looked confused but I didn’t want to be late in the second lesson too.

Okay I take it back. Not that I would be glad to be late but I would even love it if I wouldn’t come at all. Right now is lunch break but of course I didn’t go to eat. Food is the last thing in my mind right now. I had a headache right now and I wanted to sleep. Cole tried to make me talk but o couldn’t so most of the time I was just giving him short answers. Now I am at the library and sat at one of the chairs in the end. I put my head in the table, closed my eyes and tried to take a nap. Dad came into my mind. Tears started falling again. “Here. I thought that you didn’t eat anything since last night so you can eat now.” -I heard Cole who put some food in the table while looking down at me. When I met his eyes I don’t know what happened but more tears started falling. I tried to stop them but no matter what I did I couldn’t. “Baby? Come here.” -Cole sat in the chair next to me and hugged me. I felt so safe in his arms. “I’m sorry!” -I said to him crying. “Shh don’t worry. I’m here.” -and that’s how the next thirty minutes past like. Me crying and him saying nothing just staying there with me in his arms. After that we could see the other students going to the next lesson but we still didn’t move. “Come on.” -Cole said to me after I stopped crying. “I’m sorry for soaking your shirt Cole.” -He smiled at me. “Don’t worry. It’s not like I don’t have other shirts to wear. Now come on.” . “Where are we going?” -I asked him when we went outside. “The school is in the other way.” . “We’re not going at school. And do you really want to go there?” -I didn’t so I just answered no to him. “Okay then. Come let’s go.” -He opened his cars door for me and we went at the park. “Why here?” -I asked and he ignored my question. “You didn’t eat anything so you’re going to finish everything that’s here.” -I tried to but I wasn’t that hungry. “Cole can I eat the others later please?” I asked him. “Okay.” -He answered and then we walked a little bit. I was so tired that when we went at the car I fell asleep in the first minutes.

I woke up in a soft bed and in a different room. Where am I? I looked around and when I saw the medals in a corner I realized that it was Cole’s bedroom which means that I am at his house. I knew that he was here somewhere so I didn’t need to be scared. Sleep came, I closed my eyes and slept again.