𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐋𝐘! TXT.

8

Choi Jaewon took exactly 1 minute to realize Beomgyu wasn't joining her for lunch. She realized this when he didn't show up at her table and then 5 minutes later came to tell her that he was eating lunch with Kai, the most popular male in school.

Although she pretended not to be bothered by it, on the inside, she kind of hoped he would have picked to stay with her instead, but who was she kidding? She hadn't exactly been the kindest when Beomgyu tried to stay with her and the whole point of Beomgyu staying with her was to bother her into helping him become popular, which he now clearly was.

Glancing towards the popular table where Beomgyu was sitting and laughing, Jaewon stood up and threw away her lunch, hating the food even more today than usual. In a fowl mood, she left the cafeteria, not realizing Yeonjun sitting just one table away was watching her, the way he had done the moment she entered school.

Choi Yeonjun had started to observe Jaewon much more after catching her moment in the rain. He was sure Jaewon didn't know this, but they lived very close to each other, neighbors in fact and so he had seen Jaewon leave her house on Saturday all dressed up to go on her 'date' with whoever she went with.

It hadn't bothered Yeonjun because he had no relationship with her. They met once when he bumped into her by accident. Jaewon didn't even know Yeonjun was there when she laughed in the rain. Why exactly Yeonjun continued to observe her? Even he didn't know. He just found her interesting. He found it curious how she could be a cold and emotionless person in school but when standing outside in rain, she could be so happy. He wanted to learn more about her because she was unique in his eyes. Yeonjun wanted to befriend her. So, excusing himself from his friends, he stood up and followed the girl out of the cafeteria.

Choi Jaewon usually would have known that someone was following her due to her killer instincts but today, distracted by thoughts of Beomgyu, she didn't see the blue haired weirdo behind her as she headed to the rooftop of the school, the most relaxing place she could think of.

Skipping her next class wasn't a big problem, it wasn't like she had anyone at home to scold her about it. Jaewon used to be an excellent student but when her mother died, her father stopped caring about anything she did in school. This eventually led to Jaewon abandoning her studies, thinking that it didn't matter anymore.

With a surprise, Jaewon stopped walking when realized she had arrived at her intended destination.

"Oh." she softly said out loud before walking towards the railing and looking out into the city.

The best thing about her school was the city view you could see from the roof. It relaxed her and it showed her that there was a world outside her depression and loneliness. Jaewon sighed and closed her eyes, resting her arms against the railing and feeling the wind blow against her face from the height she was in.

Jaewon didn't understand how her life become like this. Skipping classes, being rude to everyone, hating the world, she had never been like this before. There was so much pain and hatred in herself she couldn't believe she used to be a completely different person.

Why had her mother left the world? Why did her father not care anymore? Why did all her friends ditch her? Why has she never had someone like her? Why couldn't she have a normal high school experience?

'I could drown in misery' Jaewon thought, scoffing as she opened her eyes and looked at the view again.

She hated this. She hated herself, she hated the world, she hated what she had become. Jaewon's eyes shifted from the view of the city to the parking lot below as thoughts she shouldn't have been thinking about filled her mind.

It would be so easy to climb onto this railing and jump down.

That one push could end everything, all her pain, all her misery, all her hatred. She wouldn't have to see a drunk father every night, she wouldn't have to work overtime with less pay everyday, she wouldn't need to regret giving up on music and she wouldn't need to think of her mother and how life could have been. It could all just be gone in seconds.

It wasn't like anyone was going to miss her.

It was as if the sensible part of Jaewon had stopped functioning. She grabbed onto the railing and hoisted herself up, standing on the edge of the school's building. Wind rushed past her and blew her long black hair behind her shoulders, the hair she's alway wanted to cut. She took a tiny step forward and a sudden thrill of adrenaline washed over her.

She loved this.

She loved the wind hitting her, she loved the height she was at, she loved holding her arms out and feeling only the breeze, she loved every single thing about this moment. She didn't think about anything either. Her mind was blank and far away from all the torture and negativity of her own thoughts that controlled her.

Jaewon was going to be free. She was going to rid herself of this pain. 

She let go.