Times up

Life fell apart, again.

Oct. 7, 2008

4:20 pm

"Greetings, I'm Miyuri Tanaka, my friends rather call me yuri, but I don't mind whatever you wish to call me. I go to the University of Tsukuba as a 17-year-old senior. I just occupied this part-time job yesterday, what may I call you?"

"Ah, Nice to meet you then! The name's Miku! I've been in this convenience store since like.. 2 years ago. I'm a junior in college, so I figured I should call you yuri-san. Where do you live?"

"Oh, I live alone right across the store. Don't get me wrong, I'm used to it. Somehow, a weakling like me managed to accept it.

"I knew that was a weird question to ask. I'm so sorry!"

"O-oh! No, It's fine! Don't feel sorry. I remain by myself ever since my whole family left. That was 9 years ago anyway."

"Oh, wow...I'm impressed with how much courage that must took you. you inspired me Yuri-San!" said Miku.

"That means a lot to me. Nice to meet you, miku." I smiled.

"You really don't have to be so professional around me. Now, cheer-up! we have a few more customers to handle." She chuckled.

Miku. For the first time in my life..I never feel lonely again. You remind me of my little sister, Thank you.

Feb. 4 2009

7:24 am

"5 months have passed since the day we first met, miku."

"Really? Wow! You remembered.."

"Ofcourse, silly. Why wouldn't I?"

"But I didn't!"

"Hm, guess you have to buy me 10 puddings then." I chuckled.

"Ehhh?? No way, i'm saving up so I could buy that dress."

"What Dress?"

She grasped her phone as she showed me a beautiful pink dress with flower prints.

"I-..I hope to wear it someday, you know?"

"You got dreams huh." I said.

"Everyone does."

"Well...How about we ask your aunt?"

"No. She...I don't want to trouble her."

"Mhm, goodluck then." I said as I smiled.

"Anyways, Valentine's day is coming! Do you have a boyfriend yet?"

"B-boyfriend? What's that?" I exclaimed.

"Eh? You never heard of it before?"

"N-no?.."

"Oh, well its a relationship between two people where you both feel safe and loved when both of you are around each other."

"I don't get it."

"You'll get it soon! I promise." She tittered.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" I ask.

"Me? Uh, no...I got a crush tho, don't tell me you don't know what that meant!"

"I don't."

"Oh my god..its a strong affection towards someone you admire the most."

"Whatever that is, it feels like a waste of time."

"Pftt, you'll like it once you try it."

"Well, we're here." I sighed.

"We'll split up then, see you after school yuri-san!"

I walked pass through my 2nd week in this university. I never really get along with anyone, I don't have friends either. I like to be alone. However, I don't want to be lonely. I guess to put it that way, I want to be alone with something...someone.

I'm sure it isn't complicated.

The next day. / Sunday

I woke up from a dream filled with puzzles, It was baffled and confusing. All I could remember was, myself...Sitting on a bench looking at random incidents, carelessly.

"Today's sunday, I finally have a break from everything, School and work is severely killing me."

I sat down with a cup of coffee thinking about that one dream I had. Something about it feels like it's, somehow, telling me something. I just can't seem to figure it out. Besides, I believe I shouldn't contemplate such thing's too easily...

1 message arrived.

I went to check who could it be.

"An unknown number...?" I blunt.

I was in a cycle of confusion as I read the message.
It took my level of hesitancy to a heavier extent.

"It won't last long." That's..that's very odd.

Feb. 7, 2009

2:04 am

*Phone rang*

"Ugh, Who could be calling at 2am in the morning??"

I grasped my phone that fell under my bed with my droopy eyes. "Hello?"

"Yuri.."

"Oh, Aunt fumi, what's up?"

"About miku..."

"Miku?..What happened?"

"You see...miku passed away of car crash just earlier, she...she was on her way back home from her shift just before it happened." Fumi said as she slowly sobbed.

I shed into tears, hopeless and shocked.

"Why..? Why are these happening to me?! Why now?!" I shouted.

"W-what did I ever do to deserve this? Tell me! Please...what have I done?!"

Losing a friend who I regard as a family and was always been there for me, just...sucks.

A week later.

Just after I finish class, i never get to see anyone again, no one. I don't have someone to cheer me up right after an exhausting day.

*sighs* "When will this end."

I walk back at my apartment as I see a mail inside the mail box, which was odd.

I saw another problem, it was a letter for the apartment rent, I realized the 5 year settlement has lapsed. I didn't even know how to react anymore, I know crying won't make anything better, at all. I have no idea how can I pay rent when I have a small amount of stipend from my part-time job.

I called aunt fuma.
She said she'd love to help me but, she can only offer me a quarter of the total rent payment.

This is where my lamentable life began again, I never imagine I could feel the resent once more.

Is this is another journey to a new chapter? Or is it just a cycle of agony and torment?