Why do I feel like this? Like acid
is eating away at my stomach,
like the world is falling off its hinges,
like our careful plan just got tossed in the garbage.
Why do I want to cry so damn badly?
Why do I want to scream and shout,
throw everything you ever gave me out?
I have spiders in my throat, spinning my mouth shut,
keeping all the words wrapped up
locked away in my chest.
You should have helped me out,
you shouldn’t have left.
I gave away trust to all the wrong people,
and I thought that you were different.
I was trying so hard to trust you,
to trust myself with you.
But you used me like everyone else.
I know you didn’t mean it.
Oh yeah, because no one ever means it!
But it hurts like you meant it—
and I can’t change the way I feel.
Oh well. I guess we’ll just go back
we’ll just go back to being less then what I wanted.
Oh well. I didn’t need these heartstrings anyway.
