Tag - I'm it.

A-z

A acceptance - I'm working on radical acceptance of my life. For a long time, it felt like someone had mixed up my story with someone else's (surely these sorts of things don't happen to ME) but I'm getting there - with accepting and making the best of what is...and spending less time dreaming. It's been rough though, I've had to face that Brad Pitt is not interested in leaving his wife for me, and that my allergy to chocolate(!)s is real, amongst other things.

B) binge reading - is a serious problem of mine, anyone want to join the new group - wattpadians anonymous ? My name is Dory and I have a problem.

C) chores: I haven't been able to do chores for so long , that the thought of being able to do them is like imagining winning the lottery. I'm sure that feeling would wear off pretty quick, but I do miss doing things for myself. I was a compulsive labeller and an organiser. My idea of heaven was a room to organise, a label maker, filing cabinet and music.

D) dessert menus should always be checked before ordering a main, as this is often where the creativity lies, but then I also really loved savoury food and entrees (or starters for those americans) for the same reason.

Savoury won hands down if there was bacon. Now I can't eat sugar or much yummy foods, so I try not to think about it. Hmmmmm bacon... On second thoughts marshmallows round the campfire, tops all food groups. I'm pretty sure that's why man started building fires . And the eleventh commandment set down in stone , there shall be no campfire without marshmelloweths. (A tea candle will do in a pinch).

E)essential start to the day - loving kindness meditation. Because I do. Not. Wake. Up. As. A . Nice. Person. Failing that, I just practice keeping quiet for the first 30 minutes and that way no one gets offended, then something changes and the world seems not so bad again and other people, not so stupid and annoying.

F) friends, I miss them all so much, I fantasise about getting them all together and cooking for them. I was a good cook and menu planning still calms me down sometimes when I'm stressed.

G) gold or silver, I love love love silver, but I am now allergic to it, so it's gold or white gold. It's hard to find nice hippie things in gold, but I'm not really into jewellery atm , so it's not a biggie. Hmm obviously a girl came up with this one.

h) heart or brain. Haha well it used to be the brain - I was, as one of my fav bloggers (lisaesile) puts it, science's bitch..but now I live more in the grey area and try and listen to my intuition and heart. As I lose cognition quite regularly and gain it back in very short spurts, it's been a relief to embrace 'not knowing ' and not judging . Still, I miss my brains previous reliability.

illness - plays a big part in my life. It really controls everything, and has become part of who I am and that's okay, according to A).

J). I also really like jellyfish. I watched a box jellyfish killing little fish at the back of a boat in Cairns marina, it was so beautiful and deadly.

K) kids, - not in this lifetime, not in this womb. For so many reasons. I figure if my situation changes and I want kids later, fostering or adopting would be the only way I'd go about it. But I doubt it. Other people's are nice though. I want to be the Aunty friend.

L) living arrangements - I have two plants that ARE growing despite my best efforts to kill them and the trauma they experience living with me in a nursing home - on the dementia ward. I don't have dementia and am still in my twenties (for a few more months) but this is the best room for my unique health needs. Stoopid health.

M) manta rays are my favourite fish, they have the biggest brain , proportionally speaking, to their bodies of all the fish, they are friendly, social and curious and feel like soft velvet.

N) nicknames , my mum and I call each other littlefish and mamafish. It started after the movie catfish and a joke about online profiles. She often goes by the sexy moniker of Fred.

O) octopuses freak me out, they are like the creepy big alien spiders of the sea - with massive brains in their head and legs - creepy creepy creepy

P) priority - nurture, love and give ...these are my priorities this year to myself and others.

Q). One drop at a time, the jar fills. Or 'poco a poco' as a friend used to say to me when I was (often) impatient, ahhhh life lessons really are never-bloody-ending. I have to remind myself of this quote on a daily basis.

R) right handed.

S) sailing, surf and sex are probably the best three things beginning with s that I can think of, not necessarily in that order. Score, if you can do all three at once.

T) tattoos - I have one of my favourite fish. I fainted when the tattooist drew the outline in pen. I'm tough like that.

U) unique - errrrrr - maybe it's my literalness ( if that's a word) I tend to take everything very literally and have a Mr Bean type humour . I really get along well with people who mean what they say. I do get it when people just say things to be nice or social or whatever, and I do this too, but most of the time I don't see the point - this goes for my comments here too, I mean what I write :).

V) virgin olive oil, the nectar of the gods, I'm sure.

W) worst thing - people pleasing, Urgh I can actually make myself sick over the most ridiculous things that others wouldn't notice, I'm getting better at avoiding this. But I'm also really bossy...which is a weird combo, but I think it ties in with the organising thing. Basically , I'm working on constantly letting go of trying to control; where things are or what people think of me.

X) X-rays, I've lost count , they were usually looking for non-existent complications because my body likes to be weird in unverifiable ways. I've never broken a bone. But, on this topic, it really riles me up, that dentists require X-rays now, to work on your teeth, it seems like a lot of unnecessary head-Rays to get your teeth checked and cleaned. :/

Y) yummy food I can make, I loved cooking Thai food , anything fresh with lots of chilli, lime, palm sugar, ginger, lemongrass , coriander etc ...in Australia we eat a lot of food like this.

Z) zodiac - Pisces, but you guessed that already.