Crimson Lace

Chapter 48

WARNING: This chapter contains subjects that may be sensitive to some individuals.

ALEC
CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT

If the planets were to revolve around me, this would be the instant they break off. The second the world stops spinning. The time that I lose my gravity, my tether, my rock to station me in the wind. The moment I wish I could float away and get forgotten in the abyss. The moment I stop living as I see her.

Elle's muscular body is slumped to the ground, her chest not rising or falling. Those eyes of sky grey have clouded over for the last time. The eyes I love are not blinking, not seeing. Not living. Vacant, deserted, desolate. Infinite words to describe that no one's home.

I stare in anguish. My whole body yearning to fall apart. The humid breeze rustling the trees in the distance, threatening to take me away.

Let them recognize me, let them chain me down and string me up. Let them come, let them take the pain away. I can't live anymore. Not with her gone. She can't be gone.

It's like banging on a glass. I'm trapped in my head. Unmoving, quiet. I scream for her. No sounds leave my lips. The shock has me caged. Frozen in time, walled in by the ice of this astronomical misery.

We were supposed to have a happily ever after. She wasn't supposed to leave me here alone. We were supposed to live and grow old.

My body is shaking. I barely notice as Carlyle plunges the Mute into my neck. In fact, I welcome the blaring ringing through my skull.

It drowns out my thoughts for a blissful moment, replacing the quiet with chaos, but somehow bringing peace for a brief instant.

Keaton's voice resumes. Like metal on concrete, the sound is dreadfully infuriating, but I elect to ignore his speech.

A sniffle beside me cuts the chains in my head, snapping me back to the present and I turn my head to find Wes with tears streaming down his cheeks. His face tortured and plagued with what looks like guilt.

Seeing him break down only validates my readiness to do the same. Shakily, I turn to the stone platform, looking over the heads of Variant soldiers to the bodies on the floor. I can hardly look at her. The lifeless expression frozen on her face. She can't be dead. Please don't let this be real. A nightmare. This must be a nightmare.

Tears line my eyes and nausea rises in my throat. Help me. Help me. Help me. It hurts. It hurts. I can't.

Ancestors make it stop, I silently plead.

I turn to Wes again, unable to understand or feel this amount of pain. "H-help me," I croak shakily. "Please."

I need these feelings to vanish. Take it away, take it all away. For hell's sake, ancestors have mercy on us.

Elle is gone.

Wes's lip quivers and he looks to the platform, shaking his head in disbelief. The girl beside him, Ash, has tears of her own, but she doesn't falter, keeping a brave exterior. Though, I don't miss her hand shake as she entwines her fingers with Wes's.

I turn to where Elle lies again, the realization setting in.

"No!" I shout, sprinting toward the platform and dropping to my knees beside her. This must be a trick. Sobs tear out of me and I cup her cheek. It's cold, bloodless. A guttural scream escapes me. One that seems to shake the whole courtyard and the palace around it. "Wake up," I whimper, dryly. "Come back to me!"

I lift her head into my arms and cradle her against me. Tears drip off my nose and roll down her chin. "Somebody help!" I cry out. This isn't over. Not for her. Not for us. This can't be how our story ends. "She needs a Healer!"