A monster, one I cannot tame,
inside of me, eating me from the inside
a pain, so intense, I cannot explain.
Life itself is hard enough but with this it's impossible,
the emotions, so many at once,
Angry, envious, depressed, hostile none of them stoppable.
The monster, big and green,
a shadowy figure,
red and mean.
The shadow of its huge, lean figure dancing in the dark,
taunt me in my daily life, my mind a dangerous place.
The monsters face is my own, but teeth like a shark.
I sometimes trick my mind into thinking it isn't there anymore,
it's just my imagination,
but beliveing it's a chore.
Sometimes I can't take it, and let the monster win,
and then I realize it is myself,
but I will not give in.
I fight forever, always knowing that this will never end,
I have to change myself and mind,
yet my mind just pretends.
So, I give up and fall to my knees,
I sink into the sticky mud
and end with a please.
The monster now is me,
and I embrace the pain
but when I try to climb out,
I know, I will never be free.
