(Yes I need more content like this! I'm dumb af leave me alone😭)
(3rd person POV)
M/n was the type of guy that was trustworthy but didn't have all the brains. Today his friend Avery asked him to go to the store to buy her some pads and stuff....that was a mistake. Not only did he not know what a pad was he met someone who was fucking chaotic and borderline insane.
(M/n POV)
Okay...wait what is a pad again? Oh crap! Avery is going to beat my ass!!! Think M/n think! She said it was like thick tissue for her....stuff. I know I care about her but this is too much even for me! Ugh! I'll just ask someone!
(3rd person POV)
M/n decided to just ask the first person that they saw, the smart decision was to as a girl since well they go through it but no he decided to ask the crazy that was in the hygiene isle....eating deodorant. Yup you heard that correct EATING FUCKING DEODORANT! God if he wasn't attractive I would slap him too trust me🤦🏽♀️
(M/n POV)
Hmm I wonder...oh! I'll just ask him maybe he knows where the pads are!! Wait... is he eating deodorant? That's kinda weird but you do you buddy!
M/n: HEY! Dude! Can I ask you something? You asked.
You had slightly startled he poor guy but when he did turn around it became quite obvious that he found a new attraction.
???: Damn dude you're sexy as hell! Can I hit that?
M/n: Huh? Why would you want to hit me? Did I do something wrong? Sorry for startling you if that was it?
???: No dude I meant that you are hella attractive! Can you come back to my place? We can have some fun~
M/n: Oh thanks! You're cute too but what do you mean by "fun" like play video games? Because if you mean by that then sure! I would love to hang out with you!
???:....You're not that bright are you? You know what? What exactly do you need anyway?
M/n: Oh yeah! Um do you know what pads are where I can get them? My friend wanted to get her some...but I don't know what they are.
???: I think they are at the end of this isle, but why would you ask me? I'm not a girl, what I know about that female shit anyway?
M/n: I guess you're right, but if you don't mind me asking...what's your name anyway?
???: Oh! It's Remus cutie! But you can call me the man of your dreams~
M/n: Your last name is Cutie? That's different...but so like it! My name is M/n! Wanna be friends? We can have fun if you want?
Remus:...You know if you weren't attractive I probably would have slapped you for being an idiot and that's coming from me...a literal embodiment of an psycho maniac....
M/n: Cool! I love the movie psycho! Horror is my favorite genre! We are going to be such good friends! Here's my number! Actually...you're really cute! Wanna go on a date?
Remus: I mean I was flirting with you as soon as I saw you but sure I like to go on a date with you and maybe at the end I can rock your world baby~
(3rd person pov)
You were clueless of his obvious flirting because let's be honest you weren't the brightest of the bunch but you still gave him your number. He walked over to you and kissed your cheek before grabbing a shit-ton of deodorant and running out of the store with paying for any of them. You laughed it off like it was just something you see on a daily basis and walked to the end and saw the pads, you had to call to ask what type she needed which ended with you getting scolded because she told before what size but you weren't really listening. When you did finally go up to the register your phone buzz from a notification, you checked it and saw it was a random person that said.
???: Can't wait to see what you taste like baby boy~😍🍆👅
You stared down at your phone confused, the only thing that came to your mind was
"But I'm not a baby or candy? What would I even taste like? Wouldn't he just taste skin or sweat?...I'm confused"
