Mortal, But At Least I'm Free

Chapter 19

Harry opened his eyes, comfortable in the warmth of Louis holding him all night. He was scared of this. Scared of how he felt and terrified of what it meant or didn't mean. But for now he was just going to enjoy the fact that someone was holding him close. He rolled over to look at the sleeping boy who was making the softest sleepy noises. Without thinking it through Harry leaned forward and kissed Louis' forehead.

He couldn't stay in bed staring all day. He rolled out of bed and tiptoed out the door, shutting it softly behind him. He stumbled his way into the kitchen where his father sat at a table, writing something down. He cleared his throat.

"Hi," Robin looked up at his son and smiled apprehensively. "Could I, um, talk to you?"

"Of course! Please, take a seat," he motioned Harry to join him at the table. The back door was open and a salty breeze was rustling their clothes.

"I have to go back to Olympus, eventually. Would you come?" Harry's voice cracked and he watched his father closely.

"Harry, I'm so sorry, I can't."

"Oh."

"It's not that I don't want to son, it's that I have a family and a life here. I can't abandon that."

"But," Harry closed his eyes and reminded himself to breathe as he tried desperately to dam the hurt from his heart. "I understand I think. It's fine."

"Harry," Robin reached out and grabbed his hand. "Harry I don't want you to go and not come back. I want to get to know you. I want to see you." Harry nodded, and pretended that there weren't tears streaming down his face, running under his chin, and down his neck.

"I just don't want to be alone."

"Oh, I know son, I know," they sat like that for just long enough that Harry could compose himself and make eye contact again with the father that he'd never known.

Once both men were composed they had breakfast together. And talked. And it was the most alive and content Harry thought he'd ever felt. They cleaned up together, and heard their own laughter matched by the two women walking in the back door. Anne kissed both of them, telling Harry she was glad he was home. And he felt good. Gemma waved nervously. He matched her nerves and mannerisms. Small talk filled their kitchen, until Gemma spoke.

"Harry, I'm really sorry about yesterday. I hope you'll forgive me," she bit her lip nervously and pulled at her fingers.

"Of course. I would really like to be your friend."

"I've always wanted a little brother," she ruffled his hair and they smiled. This felt like hope. Robin and Anne left them alone. Harry wasn't really sure what to do with himself at this point. But at the moment Gemma was teaching him a game with tiles and shapes and colors and Harry was terrible at it.

"Gemma, why don't people want immortality? Why don't you?" Harry moved his tiles into place.

"I love it here. I don't know what I would be without the people here, and I don't ever want to know. I wouldn't want to leave them."

"But....you'll die," Harry whispered, and Gemma laughed.

"Harry, I know. But there are so many worse things."

"I just don't want to be on Olympus alone," Harry sighed and Gemma reached out to hold his hand across the board.

"Why don't you ask Louis?" Gemma smiled at his sudden surprise. "Don't give me that puzzled look. You can't tell me there isn't something there. We can all see it. In the mirroring of your actions. In the way you look at him. It's the way he looks at you when you aren't looking. Is there really nothing between you two? I guess I just, I thought-"

"I don't know." Harry sighed. "I've never had someone. Like anyone. At all Gemma. Never."

"Maybe you should ask him to join you?"

"That's terrifying."

"But?"

"But not as terrifying as the possibility of not having him."

"Then you have to ask Harry."

"I know."