(( A/N~ Okay, so random drunken party Reader x Cartman for some reason. I love you guys, but I wanted to write this, so here's to Cartman's fangirls... If there are any besides me.. Buuut whatever. Herr ya go. ))
You sighed, arriving at Kenny's house. He had invited you, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Craig and his gang, Wendy and the girls, and your cousin Brad over for what he called, 'the greatest party in all of South Park!!!'. You had to admit, Ken's parties were fun to go to.. Until guys started hitting on you. Usually it was Craig, Kenny, or Brad that ended up hitting on you, which you found weird. You knew Craig liked Tweek, and Kenny was like a brother to you. Then there was Brad. He was your cousin!!!! ... Although he WAS good-looking... No, you had your eye on someone else.. In your eyes, he was the most harassed of the group, though he usually brought it upon himself..
Eric Theodore Cartman was the one who always caught your eye.
Speak of the devil, he was standing across the room, chatting with Wendy. No doubt they were talking about the recent biology project in which they got paired up. You were unfortunately paired with Stan, who quickly became too stubborn to do anything if someone else was around Wendy. He had proven this in fourth grade when Ms. Garrison paired Wendy with Kyle for the Egg Project. Kenny walked up behind you, followed your gaze to Eric, and hiccupped, obviously drunk.
"Hah! Y-ya can't be fallin' fer that ffffffffffffffffatass~!" He snickered, leaning against you. You blushed faintly and shrugged him off.
"Shaddap, Ken.." You muttered, accepting the bottle of beer he handed you. Anything to keep your mind off of Eric for more than a moment. You took a swig of your beer, taking the chance to quickly glance at him.
Your eyes had to be playing tricks on you.
Was he looking at you?
Yes.. He was. His hazel eyes met yours for a mere moment before a very faint shade of pink dusted his cheeks and he looked away. Wendy glanced over to you, furrowed her brow, and said something to Eric. He nodded, and she had a slight look of realization on her face. She smiled and ruffled his hair, walking away. Kyle then approached Cartman. Eric grinned his mischevious little grin, and stuck out his hand. All you caught was, "Hand over the Jew gold, Kahhl.." Before Kyle tackled Eric. You handed Kenny your beer and dove into the fight, prying Kyle away from Eric.
"BOTH OF YOU KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF, NOW!!!" Everyone blinked when you yelled, since you were such a quiet person. Brad chuckled quietly, and you flipped him off, earning an approving smile from Craig. You looked from a stunned Kyle to Eric, whose expression you couldn't quite read. His eyes looked a lot softer from close-up, and his brown hair appeared fluffier. No doubt he was stronger than you, which surprised you that he wasn't using his strength to get past you to Kyle. You glanced at his face once more, noticing he seemed to be lost in your eyes. You blushed, glancing away, and left the two boys there. What was up with you? You had finally fallen for someone who would obviously never like you back, that's what.. Why did you love Eric Cartman?
To start, it was his eyes. They were hazel, a mix of brown and green, but they were more brown with green threads in them. They were beautiful. Then, there was his style. He was so casual about everything.. Until Kyle called him fat. There was also his personality. He was highly racist, as were you, but nobody knew that because you kept your comments to yourself. There was also the fact that he would eat anything. At all. But, no matter what, you'd had a crush on him since third grade when Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Cartman finally allowed you to hang out with them. You didn't mind them so much after spending time with them. You and Kenny had developed a close friendship, and you considered him a brother. Shortly after, Stan had properly talked to you, and now you were good friends. You didn't really have a friendship with Kyle or Cartman, but you stood between Kenny and Cartman at the bus stop, so Cartman talked to you soon enough, though it was mostly insults for you being female. You got over it quickly, though. He seemed to be mostly messing with you, and you merely bit your lip to keep from insulting him in return.
You blinked, snapping out of your thoughts as Brad grabbed your wrist before you went upstairs.
"Hey chica, what's up?" Brad smiled faintly, and you put on a fake smile.
"Oh.. Y'know.. Nothin'. Why d'you ask?"
"Well, you've never stepped into a fight before, you've never yelled, and quite frankly, you scared a few of us by watching Fatass as intently as you did."
"Just shut the hell up, Brad.." You tugged your wrist out of his grip and went upstairs with a bottle of whiskey that you had obviously taken while your thoughts encased your mind. You had no idea what the fuck was going on, but you hid in Kenny's room. Shortly after, you heard footsteps lightly shuffling across the carpet in the hall.
"____? You here?"
That voice.. Why was he here? What did he want?
"Y-yeah, I'm here.." you responded, seeming slightly afraid. The door opened, and in walked Eric. He sat beside you on Kenny's bed and chuckled.
"What's up, ho?"
"Not much, Fatass."
"That's a loooow blow, ___," he joked.
"So's calling me a ho. So, what brings you up here?"
"Touché. Well, I figured I should come talk to you and eh.. Well.. Thank you, I guess."
"Why?"
"Because Kahl was gonna hurt me."
"Eric, you're clearly stronger than I am, and I'm stronger than Kyle is."
He muttered something unintelligible under his breath, and you blinked. "What was that? I didn't quite catch that."
Suddenly, all you knew was that you were now in Eric's arms, and his lips were firmly pressed to yours. You blushed, then wrapped your arms around his neck, causing him to chuckle. When he finally broke the kiss, you smiled up at him, and he smirked.
"I knew it."
"Knew what?"
"That you wanted to be mine."
"And what told you that?"
"Two things. First, I wanted you for my own, and second, I catch you looking at me all the time. I could just tell."
"Yeah?"
"Yep."
"And how'd you know I wasn't gonna go for Kenny or Craig; that I wasn't just leading you on?"
"I just knew."
"Yeah? Okay. I'll believe you on that one."
"You better. So.. You gonna be my ho?"
"What's a ho without her pimp, dipshit?"
"I take that as a yes?"
"Definitely."
"Pssht. Sweet. Kinny won't believe this."
"Ah, I think he will.."
Eric shrugged, and you two went back downstairs hand-in-hand, earning confused looks from everyone around except Kenny and Brad, who both grinned as you two passed by. Kenny grinned and nudged Brad, who called loudly, "I'm fucked uuuuuuuuup!" Upon that, Token brought up 'Shots', and the party was booming from then on. Not only was it an amazing party, but you got an amazing boyfriend, too.
Your parents weren't going to hear about this for another week.
(( A/N ~ Okay! There's Party Time in South Park! So, how'd you all like it? Should I do a Christmas story? I might! Okay, I'm gonna go, though! Comment, vote, anything! Let me know how you liked it! Au revoir~! ))
