(Guys I don't love you by MCR was playing while i wrote this and i had to resist killing off everyone and making gerard get married to willy instead but i didn't be proud of me!!)
Gordon Ramsay was tired. He was tired of always being the bad guy. Why couldn't he be more like his hero, WillyWonka TikTok? He was so perfect, so caring yet dominate at the same time. He lost his family, 4 of his esteemed restaurants, and his lamb sauce, just to devote himself fully to Willy. His troubles just melted away as soon as he clicked on one of his videos. His most recent one was him doing the WAP. He shot up from his chair and decided that this would be the perfect way out. The last hurrah of being the sultry bad guy before his turn into the most caring, devoted tiktoker he could be. He needed a good location though. He decided on the WalMart bathrooms. It would be a large shock to everyone!
Across town, Willy was hanging out with his Oompa-Loompas. He needed a new video idea. All his fans loved it when he did the WAP dance (the author here sure did) so maybe he could make a more extreme version. With everything going on Covid wise, what better way to risk his health and safety then doing the dance in the WalMart bathroom?! He hopped in his Ford Fiesta with his fellow Oompa Loompas and started going 30 in a 45 lane, desperate to get to his destination.
Gordon arrived to the WalMart and sighed, the McDonalds employees cowering in fear. He walked over to the bathrooms and sat on a handicapped toilet, picking out the WAP sound before setting up his Iphone 67 in the perfect position. He put in his Airpod mega pros and waited for the sound to start. He was halfway through the song, when he heard someone walk in.
He cursed. He forgot to lock the door! He fell on his face and was greeted with a angelic and familiar voice.
"Well Gordon, your a bad nut aren't you? Ha, yeah!"
He gasped. It was his idol, his king, his..his very life source.
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Willy arrived at the Walmart restroom, and looked down at the now face-planted..Gordon Ramsay?! He gasped and blushed. He adored Gordon with his very essence, every fiber of his being. What he didn't see, however, was his Oompa Loompas leering at Gordon in disgust. He never realized, even to this day, how much his fellow orange companions adored him. Not in a good way, either.
The Oompa Loompas walked away while Willy and Gordon striked up conversation.
"So, what do you think our plan should be?"
"Lure him out with some lamb sauce to the dumpsters. You distract Willy, I'll nail Gordon"
They shook hands and walked back, seeming as if they were merely washing their hands.
"Willy! A forgotten Oompa Loompa is about to fall into the bargain book bin!"
Willy gasped and ran out, looking for the non-existent Oompa Loompa.
The other Oompa Loompa sniffed around.
"Gordon! Do you smell that?!"
"Smell what?"
"It smells like..LAMB SAUCE!!"
Gordon screamed in his deep british voice and ran with the Oompa Loompa, down into the alley, past the hobos and into a dumpster. He searched around in the black bags, when he smelled a vaguely familiar scent. Almost like..gasoline?! He looked up, only to see a orange face smiling cruelly down at him, throwing a struck match into his eyeball before slamming the lid shut.
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It was 6 years later. When the hobos discovered Gordons charred corpse, they ran into the Walmart, screaming. The Oompa Loompas were found guilty after glove prints and green strands of hair were found at the scene.
And as for our friend Willy? He shut down his factory, moved away to Georgia. There, he met a wonderful man named Dwayne. Dwayne the Rock Johnson. They got married after dating for 57 minutes, and lived a quiet life up in North Carolina. They adopted 14 children, all half Big Chungus. Willy missed Gordon, but fear not dear readers, he would survive.
THE END
Lol guys i honestly don't know anymore, me and my best friend thought of this, I love WillyWonkas tiktok fr tho i hope he reads this lol thx
