We Could Have Been Friends

Vince

Back at the Foundling Hospital, all the boys were ever told about their future was that they'd grow up and join the army. We were taught to match in sync and we're quizzed on how to assemble a canon. Nothing practical, like how to mend your uniform. The was for the girls who were only ever told they'd be in service as cooks and maids. Not writers.

I was told what happens to deserters, and I always teased Gideon that he would be one. But he didn't even get that far, he's happily working as a gardener with Sheila and his sister... Hetty Feather.

Me on the other hand, became exactly what I said Gideon would be. A deserter.

I ran into them though, after all that time I ran into Gideon, Shiela and Hetty as a runaway. They set me straight and saved my cowardly hide. Back to the army, giving me another chance to flourish as a soldier. The one young Vince from the Foundling Hospital always said he'd become.

I never saw the girls again. I met up with Gideon and the other boys to congratulate Mathias. The blighter ran away to America to stay with his sweetheart, Harriet. But I couldn't stay long, my regiment was moving along. It was good to see them all again, especially Judd.

I've come across Hetty's articles in the paper. Of course, she's doing something that sticks out, a redhead amongst brunettes and blondes, like a ruby red rose amongst a field of daisies.

I'm not one for poetry, but I'm quite proud of that.

Sometimes I wish I had taken that chance that day in the storage shed. Or that Sheila hadn't dobbed in Ida Battersea in when she found the two together.

No. I can't blame anyone but myself. I shouldn't have taken the pin. Winterson was the only nice adult anyone in the Foundling Hospital knew after they arrived there.

I just thought of her as a target in my sick little game. I didnt even need the pin to get the dominoes to play with Hetty. I'm sure if I asked she would have given it.

Or I could have just pulled her back to play to continue playing tic tac toe in the flour. Cook wouldn't have noticed.

I could practically read Hetty's mind as we exchanged glances as we duelled against each other drawing naughts and crosses on the floor because I was thinking the same thing about her, that she wasn't so bad after all.

She was the first and only person I have ever told about my brother, she must probably pitied me more than anything and I her, no one gets punished like Hetty Feather. Matron had it out for her and we all knew it.

I was so selfish pulling her back just to play dominoes with her, to spend a little more time with her before we had to rejoin the others. To be taught something that wouldn't be necessary for my survival. To see that look in her sapphire eyes as she placed her brother Jem where I was sat reminiscing the days that she was free of responsibility.

But then Mathias came snarling "Give it back to her you snake!" I told her he was lying and I insisted I was telling the truth. Of course, she didn't believe me, I lie so easily but she saw right through me. She gave me a chance and I carried on insisting. Then she realised that Ida had snuck onto the grounds and ran for her because I made her late.

To be fair, neither of us knew Ida was coming, had I known I would have liked to say 'hi', she was a great cook, she made the best pastries.

I was dumb enough to give e pin back to her when she was mad. I thought she'd forgive me, that we wouldn't go back to just being acquaintances or allies of allies.

But I was wrong, she left me standing at the kitchen regretting my actions looking down at the hand that touched hers knowing I'd never get to see that look in her eyes again. Her scornful words ring in my ears to this day, though she has forgiven me, she hasn't forgotten.

I had my chance.

But I didn't take it and now, I'm just a lonely soldier fighting an endless war.