"Hello?" "Um, hey?" "Wait, you don't sound like my Aunt Kathy." "Unless I was miraculously converted into a member of the opposite gender and somehow related to whoever is on the other side of this call, then yeah. I'm not your Aunt Kathy." "Oh, shiitake mushrooms." ...
***I Don't Eat Cupcakes*** "Cupcake?" I eyed the sugary snack and willed myself not to stuff the whole thing in my mouth. "No thanks. I'm not hungry." Lie "I ate before I got here." Lie "So I'm pretty full." In case you haven't guessed it yet that was also a big. fat. lie. Now why would I not want to eat a perfectl...