Funny Texts and Jokes

Just a bunch of funny texts and jokes. I've gotten them online and offline.

Funny texts

Unlimited funny jokes guaranteed to make your day! Credits to whoever made these jokes.

Despicable Arrogance

There are five things that I hate: 1.) Arrogant Guys 2.) Guys who have girls falling at their feet and they proceed to use them 3.) Guys who assume everyone loves them 4.) Guys who ride motorcycles 5.) Strawberry Ice Cream And Grayson Carter just so happens to be 4 of them. Even his name...

️Running With Scissors ✅

Constance thought she could finally stop looking over her shoulder. She has a steady job as a hairstylist, rents a small apartment next door to her best friend, and keeps a routine that distracts her just enough to not have to dwell on her past. All seems right in her world until a homeless man who's on the FBI's Most...

The Bad Boy, Cupid & Me

Reece smirked, "Trust me Chloe, the good girl always falls for the bad boy." Chloe Armel is a good girl. She never gets in trouble, gets excellent grades and is loved by everyone. Enter Reece. Wild, badass and has an ego that honestly couldn't get any bigger. He gets into fights, breaks every single rule and couldn't...

The Good Girl's Bad Boys [Book One of TGGBB Series] (Completed, Editing)

If you're judging this book by its cover and title, you're already proving the point this story wants to make. Try to move past this satirical obstacle in front of you. This is a story about bullying, and like the hundreds of other books on the topic, it will show you the harsh reality of being discriminated, belittle...

Hating The Player

|| Highest Rank - #1 in Teen Fiction and #5 in Romance || Melody Carson has been in the same class as Tyson McCannon since primary school. She's watched him play with girls, set the school on fire, skip classes, prank teachers, smoke behind the school, break the law, get into fights with other guys for fun and even w...

The Jock's Blackmail

Unknown Number: Well you gotta give me something! Hell, anything! You can't just dangle this in front of me for the rest of my life! Me: I wasn't planning on it... Unknown Number: Blackmail is a crime, you know! Me: I'M NOT BLACKMAILING YOU! Unknown Number: WHERE'S YOUR SENSE OF ADVENTURE! YOU GET AN OPPORTUNITY LIKE...

I'm The Gang Leaders Possession

|| Highest Rank - #1 in Humor || Aria Daniels has one of the most vivacious personalities ever. She is a crazy teenage girl that is impossibly hard to drag down. So what happens when she finds a letter telling her that her brother has been kidnapped and won't be returned unless she pays sixty thousand dollars? She do...

Knowing Xavier Hunt ✓

|| Featured FREE story with exclusive paid chapters - previously a paid story || When Haley discovers the truth behind Xavier, whose silence holds a deeper meaning, she sets her mind on making his life better one small step at a time. ***** Haley Ro...

Mr. Popular and I

"You and I both know that any girl would kill to be in your position, with me, right now." He smirks, knowing that what he's said is completely and utterly true. Lea Wilson and River Parker don't mix; they don't like the same things, their lives are majorly different. But, what if these two people who are least expect...

Bad Boy Isn't My Type... (Published as 'The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Boys)

"The good girl always falls for the bad boy," he sneered and I smirked. "Well, you're in luck because I'm not a good girl," I retorted, causing a small smile to appear on his face. "Prove it." When Andy Deeks moves away from home to attend university, she soon regrets not checking out the details on her new roommate...

A Bad Boy Stole My Bra- SAMPLE

A BAD BOY STOLE MY BRA is published and no longer available on Wattpad. It is available in multiple languages, including English, French, German, Italian and Indonesian as paperback and e-book internationally. It is also available as an adaptation on the app Episode - 'It Started With a Bra.' This copy has the first 3...

Babysitting The Bad Boy

{#1 in teenagers} {#2 in fiction} {#2 in popular} "You better not tell anyone about this." "Aw why not? I'm sure your fandom of desperate girls would love to know that their precious prince charming needs a babysitter." I smile innocently back at his death glare. "I'm serious, nerd. I could make your life hell." ...

Running with His Child

After being involved with a cold-hearted mafia boss, Robyn Lehman decides its time to run. Little did she know, she was carrying the future heir to his entire empire. Will he find her again? Or will she stay hidden forever? =+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= He got up from the bed, pulling up his pants and not taking a gla...

Trouble Maker

Jessica Stewart. Her middle name is trouble. Wherever she steps her foot into, she will cause some kinda trouble, and that is guaranteed. Her roommate has had enough of her problems, and decides to kick her out of the house. Her only best friend, Isabella, can't accommodate her because she lives with her boyfriend, A...

The Bad Boy Stole My Notebook

Lilah is the plain, simple girl that no one notices. She's just another face in the crowd, nothing more. Her world is very different from the ones of her two best friends, which causes them to rarely see each other. So, they share a notebook. They write their feelings and their secrets in this notebook and it is only...

Kidnapped by the Mafia on Purpose

I was kidnapped by the mafia I know that sounds like a bad thing but for me it couldn't come at a better time. So I let them take me I will act like a victim so they think they won but will I be able to keep acting like I'm some naive girl or will they find out that I'm not the person they thought I was. My name is Sa...