❝ some people suck toes, and some fuck hoes. but me? oh baby, i do both. ❞ ed sheeran x reader toe-sucking one shot ───────────────────── 🏷️...→ author's note: this has been in my drafts for a while so i'm posting it now lol. enjoy! (shit posting is fun ok)
pov: you are a hungry boy. a very hungry boy so you fuck a (limited edition) KCF fleshlight. awful traumatizing story brought to u by famel bob productions. written by famel bob and edited by famel bob himself
a bag of shredded cheese. a girl with a love for shredded cheese. (and a shitty author to write about it) a passionate love unfolds. ─ in which her love for shredded cheese goes beyond what a shitty shredded cheese fanfiction could ever hope to describe.
POV: you decide to treat yourself to a self-care day and fill yourself with positivity and self-love 💗 (it's all wholesome until you realize that y/n is going to do that by fucking a rose quartz dildo) another awful traumatizing shit post brought to you by famel bob productions.
𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐒 ! ❪ grass x fem! reader ❫ ❝ go and play with the grass. maybe it cures your horniness, wack ass hoe 。❞ 𝗜𝗡 𝗪𝗛𝗜𝗖𝗛, a teen who is down bad is convinced by their best friend to go touch some grass. and they do - or something like that. ──────────────────...
❝ listen, i don't have a food kink or anything of that sort but... i really, really wanna fuck that bagel right now. ❞ ❝ bro wtf ❞ ❝ it- IT JUST LOOKS SO... SO FUCKABLE ❞ ─── IN WHICH , , , y/n fucks a very good looking bagel (and then eats it) ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ story by: @-cxothicol ↳ ꒰🏷️꒱ STATUS: [ 𝗖...
[ warning: EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT ] SUMARRY: life is short, might as well... steal a carrot and shove it up your ass in the walmart restrooms? ──────────────────────── 🏷️... → author's note: another short story (these are fun to make) because i'm bored and i still haven't updated any of my other books. enjoy...
y/n has a dick. y/n fucks the thanksgiving turkey. thanksgiving is fucked (literally) thanks to y/n. happy thanksgiving! featuring: a 'i'm fucking done with this job' narrator credit to my friends during lunch for idea.
