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  • Snow Boots (#3)
    580K 46.2K 70

    "You've reached Westerden Ski Lodge, how may I be of assistance?" "Hey, can I rent some snow boots and skis? Maybe even a girlfriend, if you've got any in stock." "Awesome, do you want to order a life along with that? The gift wrapping's free of charge." "I'll take what I can get." ...

    Completed  
  • Misfits
    1M 88.5K 70

    "Hello?" "Is your house on fire?" "No...?" "Man, I thought it was because you're so dang hot." "I think you need to work on that." ... One prank call One girl One guy One great story ********* Cover by RaghaddMurad Highest Rating: #1 in short story

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  • Teen Helpline [#1 of the Helpline Trilogy]
    2M 159K 43

    ❝Hello there, this is Teen Confessions Helpline, what's the problem? Feel free to confess anything you like and we'll be there to help you every step of the way!❞ ❝I know this is heavy but I've been feeling like I kind of...want to kill myself.❞ When Damien Carson, a depressed lonely teenager, call...

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  • Anger Management
    2.1M 176K 43

    ❝Good morning. This is Target, how can I help you?❞ ❝Why do I have the sudden urge to kill my family?❞ ❝...Woah...well...shit. Ma'am, I think you dialed the wrong number.❞ ❝No. I dialed correctly. Are you any help?❞ ❝...No sé qué decir a esta chica loca.❞ In which a girl named Farah calls Target and meets a boy named...

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  • The Starbucks Hotline
    1.4M 115K 42

    ❝Hello, this is the Starb-❞ ❝HEEELP ME!! PLEASE! THERE'S A MURDERER IN MY HOUSE!❞ ❝OH SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!! WHAT DO I DO?! THIS IS STARBUCKS, NOT FREAKING 911. WAIT, HOLD ON. TRY TO KEEP YOURSELF ALIVE, I'LL CALL 911!! STAY CALM. IT'S GOING TO BE O- ❞ ❝Wait...did you just say Starbucks?❞ ❝Um...yeah?❞ ❝They have a hotlin...

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  • Eye Drops (#2)
    1.1M 85.2K 71

    "This is Westerden Optometrist. What are your symptoms?" "For starters, my eyesight has been super blurry and distorted, and this problem is starting to screw up seventeen-year-old life. Speaking of which, you sound kind of young for an optometrist. How old are you?" "Um, I don't think it'd be the greatest idea for th...

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  • Waffle Cones (#1)
    5.3M 368K 70

    "Hello?" "Um, hey?" "Wait, you don't sound like my Aunt Kathy." "Unless I was miraculously converted into a member of the opposite gender and somehow related to whoever is on the other side of this call, then yeah. I'm not your Aunt Kathy." "Oh, shiitake mushrooms." ...

    Completed