-MuRdErOuSbutterfly

anyway, im a freshman. wow, ain’t that crazy. i was in 7th grade when we were friends, i think. now i’m all the way in high school??? i’m on the freshman basketball team, but i hate the coach. he never plays me, and instead plays people who suck more than i do. i’m an FFA officer, but i’m more sure if you know what that is. i’ve failed my first two tests ever this year, so i hate everything. i’ve been really sad and lonely lately. my best friend is in a relationship, and she has been for a while. she’s been getting more and more distant since being in it, and i can’t help the intrusive thoughts that tell me constantly how much she probably hates me. she’s like this in relationships, though. i should understand this by now, but it still pisses me off. just because you suddenly get with someone doesn’t mean you isolate your friends and stop talking to them. anyway, im learning french. i have two pigs that im getting ready for our livestock show:  a dark cross/hamp named peninsula, and a chester white named pipsqueak. they annoy me so much. i’ve started getting really into poetry, which is so weird. i never though i’d be the person to write poetry lol. im over some dude named jayden, who i liked for a while actually. but unfortunately i am attracted to yet another jayden, spelled the same but in a different grade.  im a sucker for curly hair. there’s also someone named dani and she’s a cutie pie. anyway, i miss mia a lot. she was my old friend who like hates me now. unfortunately, she and my best friend are still really close. actually, she’s close with all of my friends because we were a whole friend group for a while lmao. so everything sucks, and i can’t even talk to my friends for a while without having to hear things about how she’s doing now. i really miss her. i miss don’t think i miss you anymore. we didn’t know each other long enough for me to still be missing you. i don’t really think i know how to miss people to be honest. i think i just lie about it. xo

sometimes i wonder if you ever think about me lol, but i know it’s stupid to ponder.

we're two totally different people now, but I would still love to get to know you again, so please. if you're still out there somewhere, anywhere, please. talk to me, message me, do something. anything. every time i look at wattpad, it's a ghost town. it just brings me back to your dead profile and makes me think the worst. at this point, im worried that you're dead and buried in a grave somewhere.

two years ago you told me you would  come back, and your parents were just confiscating your ipad for a little while

you told me you were coming back

Hello ! Hope it’s okay that I am messaging you on here, I was just wondering if you would like to do a R4R/ V4V with me where we support each other !❤️ sending you love and let me know if you are interested. 
          
          P.s : kindly read my biography for a better understanding on how I accomplish my R4R requests 

Good morning! Make sure to eat a good breakfast and do all your homework before you go to class. Love ya!

My hip was literally almost upside down. Idk how it got knocked out of whack, but I just started noticing it recently. It hurt a shitton to move, and still kinda does lol. On Saturday, we had a tournament, and my back was really hurting. I did jump ball for our game, and after that I could barely make my way down the court. Eventually my mom came, and after the game she took me to a chiropractor, and he said that I wouldn't be able to play in the rest of the tournament, but my mom said I could anyway since I cried about it in the car. 
          
          I missed the second game, but my team won it along with the first one, meaning that we would go to the championship. After a few hours, my back/hip was feeling a lot better, and so I played, BUT IN THE LAST 58 SECONDS OF THE GAME I LANDED HARD ON MY LEG AND MESSED IT UP AGAIN. I WAS SO PISSED. We ended up getting second in the tournament, and I had to go back to the chiropractor. 
          
          Moving on, I still haven't had a conversation with the new girl. One of my best friends was in a mental hospital for a while back, and now I think she's going to try and go back. Another girl is half dead because a guy forced her to give him a bj, and then spread her nudes around the school. A few others got caught with cocaine on school grounds, and the only punishment they received was a few days off from school. I haven't written since November, but i've been reading a tonnnnnn since my TBR has over 100 books on it, all of which I own. 
          
          I found my LED light remote, so I don't have to buy new ones. These sentences sound so choppy, and I really hate it, but bear with me, it's 10:39 at night and I'm tired asf. This year has been terrible and I just want it to end. Anyway I'm running low on characters. Sorry that I can't tell you everything, but 2000 characters isn't enough. Ily and imy, I hope to talk to you soon. Sleep well, eat something, and have a nice day tomorrow.

A hot new girl moved to my school. Everyone thought she was a guy at first LMAO. I made eye contact with her a few times today, and the day she moved to our school, and I THINK I AM IN LOVE. My best friend and I keep talking about her, and apparently she gives everyone who looks at her butterflies. There were straight girls who were checking her out. Fortunately, finding the homophobes has become considerably easier since her arrival. Just from bits and pieces of people's conversations, you can tell who to run away from. Like today, so many people were saying, "I thought it was a boy at first, and I was attracted to it, but now..." and shit. Like, that's not okay. UNFORTUNATELY she's taken, and moving back to where she used to live very soon. Ik that I could never catch anyone like her n all, buttttt I can have hope. I curled my hair for her today, and I've never had a conversation with her before in my life. I have no classes with her, but we can still be in love right :(? Anyway, I've figured out that I am not in fact in love with my best friend. She's just my favorite person on earth, and I got that confused with love. I think that's the way it was with you. I thought, for some reason, that I had a crush on you tbh. Idk if you felt the same way (you prob didn't lmao), but it was awkward. Okay okay, back to the subject. New girl's name is Sofia. Idk how tall she is, but she has kinda short black hair and more masculine features. IT'S HOT TRUST ME. OMG so I was walking down the hallway this morning with my best friend and she was walking behind us. I FREAKED OUT. SKJDFSDFJ. At lunch she was sitting outside, and we were too (I sit with three of my best friends, usually in the library, but we decided to sit outside today), AND IT WAS THE BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE. She was out there, and we made eye contact like seven times. IM IN LOVE. Ofc she could've been checking out my best friend since she's hot asf, but a girl can dream. ANYWAYIMRUNNINGOUTOFCHARACTERSILYIMY<3
          xo

I just wanted to tell you that I made the basketball team a while back! not A team or anything, but hey, at least I made it. I'm a starter on the B team, and I think that I've been doing pretty well recently. We have a game on Thursday against one of our rival schools, and I'm really excited about it. Alsoooo, something hilarious, someone at school decided to say that I was the worst person on the team. A lot of people came up to me and laughed at her about it, because um, no. The only reason I'm not on the A team is because I get anxious and forget how to shoot correctly sometimes. BUT ANYWAY today at practice we scrimmaged, and LMAO. I was in for the whole game, AND SHE NEVER GOT OFF THE BENCH. Like girll, if you were good, you would be put in. Moving on, I've been trying to get out of algebra for a while now, but the counselor keeps trying to talk me into staying. I dont understand anything that's going on in that damn class. Oh also I might be in love with my best friend. SHE DOESNT LIKE PHYSICAL CONTACT A LOT, BUT WHEN SHE HUGS ME I GET BUTTERFLIES??>? She accidentally kissed me on the cheek today, and it made me so happy. Last night i was texting her, and she changed my contact name in her phone to "fav person in the entire world <3" AND ISTG I JUST GRINNED AT MY PHONE FOR A SOLID MINUTE. I mean we've kissed before but we were just playing spin the bottle at a birthday party (it's so fun), and that was before I knew her as well as I do now. I flirt with her allll the time, but I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm just playing around KJSDOJFISDHf. Anywayy, I hope your schoolyear is going well. I'm pretty sure you used to love volleyball, right? Hope you made the team! Remember that you're the most beautiful person on this planet <3. Ily.