mísha :(

// fuck i miss mísha :)

// remember when this account wasn't dead?
          me neither
          has it been that long?

// i repeat to myself that they’re not really gone. time has proven that fooling yourself into believing a lie is the most effective way to deal with things you have no control over. i keep listening to the playlists they made me, overanalyzing every single word i hear. was this a sign that things were going wrong? no, i was the one that cared too hard, not them. i stay up every single night staring at my phone, either attempting to gather up the courage to turn these demons, these constant reminders of my loneliness, into nothing more than a bad dream, or praying just for one second i could feel the warmth of equally returned love. i usually go out for coffee four times a week by myself. i always bring my notebook, i never stop writing. i leave little comics and thank you notes with my tip, and watch them smile as i get in the car. i always talk down on myself whenever possible. my life is shit because i deserve it, right? i must have done something really bad, and it's nearly impossible for me to cry now. i tend to avoid my friends for weeks even though they’re the only sense of consistency i have left in my life. if they really wanted to see me they’d come, but they won’t. who cares? i've allowed myself to lose interest in the things i love. i watch as i begin to take a backseat to the world around me, i'm done fighting. i've started to become a secondary character in my own motion picture. but most importantly i drown every single one of my feelings in small slices of my skin created by a blade. i learn to love the feel of it slipping through like butter. i've found comfort in the warmth coming from my stomach, the pain nauseating. i don't need other people to drown out my loneliness, i just needed a way to talk to it.

@-delicacy
          // if it makes you feel any better, ill try

@-delicacy
          // hard to keep a pma when ever breath is pain

@-delicacy
          // thank you, but i don't deserve it

// :(

//all art done by sokodraws on twitter and instagram. im just an anon, and i am NOT taking credit for her amazing artwork or her character. i identify so so much with mísha, which is why i decided to make an anon for him. if you have any questions, comments, concerns, feel free to contact me.//

//MÍSHA AUTOCRRECTED TO AMISH I'M DEAD//

happy new year, i guess