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mane y'all never even read my statuses. you're all too busy scratching your bootyholes like you got an STD

the Welsh word for microwave is popty ping and that's also the noise a snail makes when you throw it in a metal bucket

should I write txt one shots where y/n meets them at a furry convention...? ◉_◉

I was just tryna shower for work and a roach came out the shower head  

hey everyone update on my gaping hole. omw to the hospital cause idk why it feels like Satan is peeing lava on it