AB_WINTER

High above the mountains I
          Lock my feelings up so tight
          A thousand steps into the sky
          Trapped in a prison behind my eyes
          I put on my bravest face
          Like all my troubles are miles away
          Nothing there ever escapes
          The labyrinth I built inside my brain
          
          Then when I'm all alone
          I stand and stare out the window
          Into my soul
          And wonder if I was
          Wonder if I was
          Born to be mortar and stone
          A cynic with blood that runs cold
          And never knows
          What it feels like to be close
          
          Every second every hour
          I take bricks and build the tower
          I use all my strength and power
          Just so I can hide and cower
          Every second every hour
          I take bricks and build the tower
          Safe and sound my life devoured
          I realize I am the tower
          
          Now the air is getting thin
          The clouds they dance and my head spins
          But if I stop what I'm building
          My feelings just might catch up then
          I'll crumble back to the earth
          A pile of rubble and dirt
          What will all this have been worth
          
          Every second every hour
          I take bricks and build the tower
          I use all my strength and power
          Just so I can hide and cower
          Every second every hour
          I take bricks and build the tower
          Safe and sound my life devoured
          I realize I am the tower
          
          Safe and sound my life devoured
          I realize I am the tower

vent time!!! so basically I woke up and js felt like shit, but I go to skl and pretend I'm fine blah blah, everything is going fine until last period (geometry honors). First, I nearly have a panic attack, then my crush makes eye contact with me while I was staring at him, and then my teacher mispronounces my name in front of the whole class and I have to correct him. Then I play like shit at practice and have a mental breakdown in the bathroom while these two bitches r filming a TikTok dance (they asked coach if they could go do homework and now r doing this) and then I go home and find my out my dad is getting foot surgery, which I knew, but ITS TOMMOROW, which is also picture day and I have a match, and the one person I can talk to this about is also the worlds biggest asshole, but he's the only one who listens instead of js patronizing me

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happy bday to me my dad almost needed surgeryyyyyyyyy

today I was walking to band class when I feel a hand in my hair so I turn around and its my friend and I obv ask him 'whyd u touch my hair' and this kid goes 'idk it looked shiny'😭

"you'd prefer to blame the girl than deal with your own sin"

now that we're in the same class I wonder if he thinks about the way we used to be when the teacher calls my name for attendance, his name gets called right after mine bc of our last names, our phones r next to each other in the phone holder, I texted him but he never responded, I miss him sm but I don't think he misses me

LESS THAN 10 DAYS TO MY BDAYYYYYYYYYYYY also I got new bookssssss and redecorated my room I'm so exciteddddd

I FACE REVEALED TWIN

I'm back after disappearing for a week I was on vacay lol AND OMFG MY FAM IS HAVING DINNER W HUZ'S TMRW AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH