AM1ASS
قد تكون الرسالة مسيئة
It's been a really long time, it's kind of weird to me writing on this again. I'm really just here to explain why I just kind of disappeared .
I really enjoyed writing here. I was able to just throw my ideas into places and I found people who really enjoyed things I did. It was an escape for me.
My life is an absolute mess, I will say that. Amias isn't around anymore, I was never really told what happened. Amias was discharged and their parents hid them from me.
I went to their funeral maybe a month ago. It was really beautiful in all honesty, I got to speak in front of all their family members and say goodbye properly.
After Amias just disappeared I was left confused and angry. I took it out on a lot of people close to me and it ruined them. I was alone and just an asshole honestly.
I got really depressed and decided I shouldn't be alive anymore. I attempted to overdose, but my brother was around. My parents took everything away from me in fear of me hurting myself. I stopped eating, drinking, sleeping, and I basically turned into a corpse. I developed an ED and it's been awful.
I'm not really any better yet physically. I've healed my relationships, I have an amazing boyfriend who loves and cares for me. My friends came back, I'm a tad bit happier now.
I probably won't be coming back for a while because a lot of things from Amias are on here and I don't want to remember any of that while healing. Some chapters are still on here, and even though they're unfinished, I will post them.
I just want to say thank you to anyone who really kept coming back to check if I had posted, and I'm sorry for not saying anything sooner. Samswell I saw what you said, and I'm so sorry that happened to you. You seem like an amazing person and you were one of the people who influenced me to start this page. I'm sorry I couldn't finish that story for you, but I hope that maybe I'll get better and finish it one day.
Much love,
Mxcha.
daydreamery012
@AM1ASS Hello Mxcha, I am terribly sorry for responding just now. I've had a lot of health and personal issues to deal with, and I didn't come here for a long time. Mxcha, I'm terribly sorry to hear everything that you went through. It breaks my heart to know you've gone through all that. I'm so sorry again for your loss. I'm really proud of you for overcoming the ordeals that life has thrown on you. I'm so relieved you are not alone, and you have people around you on which you can count on. I missed you so much! ♡ Mxcha, I hope you are feeling amazing now and that you're in perfect health. I know about ED for having struggled with that myself. I hope you are happy and striving every day. I am so touched by your kind words (my previous username was samswell). Thank you again for writing the Blade fanfic for me. You inspire me so much. Reading your works and your pov on youtube always brightens my day. Please don't worry. Put yourself first. Your health and happiness come first. I would love to read more of the Blade fanfic, but all this can wait. The priority is you and your happiness. Thank you again for the kind words and for sharing about what you've been through. It's very heartwarming to read the way you speak about your journey and the efforts you made. I'm so proud of you. You are incredibly strong. I hope nothing ever comes clouding your days, and each passing day fills you with positive energy only, and you're surrounded by people radiating of the same energy. Mxcha, you have nothing to apologise for. It takes a lot of courage to open up like this and on something so personal and be so honest about it.Thank you again for sharing this with us. I'm sending you healing energy and the biggest warmest hugs. You are so sweet Mxcha ♡♡♡ Take good care of yourself, and I wish you the best. I'm rooting for you. Be patient and kind to yourself. Amias would be proud of you if they could see how far you'd come.