Alex

Hey, hope you're doing alright <3

Hi

My brother’s being a fascist again

 It’s always nice to wake up to a safety pin lodging itself carefully 2cm deep into your toe because you did sewing and other shït on your bed the previous day and didn’t clean up well enough 

I am a disappointment

So because I’m dyslexic I have a tier-temps on my exam, basically I get longer than other people to finish my test - AND FOR SOME REASONS - sorry I’m really mad about this - PEOPLE KEEP GETTING ANNOYED THAT I GET MORE TIME BECAUSE APPARENTLY I’M ‘NOT DYSLEXIC ENOUGH’. 
          
          It kind of hurt to be honest. Just because I do my best and re-read everything a gazillion times and like writing as a hobby and just do everything I can so people can’t see I’m dyslexic doesn’t mean I’m not. Like all that takes time and is draining in general, which is EXACTLY WHY I HAVE MORE TIME! 
          
          :(

Ah to be dyslexic and have additional time for the upcoming mock exam, only to find out that you didn’t actually read the seventh and last book of Narnia and then go off to daydream about having a career in the performing art in the future, only to realize that there isn’t any more milk in the fridge, only to remember that you hate milk so why is that relevant, and how were any of those points linked? I don’t know, but I don’t do drugs and I just realize that cats don’t bark but a reindeer’s ankle jingles, while Vichy is actually a small town in France and Walt Withman was a really good queer poet.
          
          
          
          I’m having a great time being depressed, in other news. It’s like I’m happy but I’m not feeling any emotions, which is vaguely concerning. 

So in choir there was this really pretty girl and she was singing so pretty and I couldn’t help but stare at her and I definitely have a crush on her and I want to hold her hand and touch her hair and marry her when I get older do you think my girlfriend will mind?
          
          
          
          
          Just kidding the pretty choir girl is already my girlfriend :)

I’ve had fours weeks now to read a book for school, and I still haven’t started
          
          you know what’s the worse about this? I’ve actually tried
          Like I just can’t
          I don’t even now if it’s dyslexia like it’s written so small and packed together but like also I just have trouble in general reading books given by the school
          To be completely honest I don’t think I’ve finished a single book given by the school for a long time - and I’ve read plenty of other books in the meanwhile. It’s not necessarily that they’re boring, I think its just I don’t like being told to read something and even worse studying it from other people’s point of view 
          I always say I’ve read the book, but really I’ve read half of it and skinned thought the rest, seen the filmed staged performance if it’s a play or like just read a bunch of summaries
          There’s a bunch of classic books I havent read even through i wanted to read them, just because I was told by the school to read them and it just blocked me
          
          I’m sad and I have to do a few hours worth of work this week-end because we had online school but I didn’t even start some of the work I was supposed to do
          
          
          I kinda wanna cry but my family might come into my room at any time so I’m writing instead and listening to angsty broadway music
          
          I’m sad yeah 
          
          And stressed
          
          Mostly stressed
          
          But being stressed makes me sad
          
          I need my girlfriend where is she
          
          I want to write an angsty one shot but I don’t know what to write
          
          
          Help me please

I finally wrote a “About” that I don’t hate for this account yay