"Chapter 24-Nowhere else to go
I stalked out of the Tower. Jarvis told me to look in a slot by the door, which I did. A wad of cash and some checks addressed to me slipped out into my hands. I thanked him and slid the money into my purse. "Does Tony know about this?" I asked.
"No. Just... Don't forget to tell Siri about this."
"Will do, my big, technological softy." I smiled and walked out of the door.
Remember, reader, that when someone says life hands you lemons and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it, say, "Oh you are dead wrong." Here's a list of things that you can do with the lemons.
1) Give the lemons back to Life and say, "Shove those lemons where the sun doesn't shine!"
2) Forcibly hurl the lemons back and scream, "I DON'T WANT THIS DAMN PRODUCE, LIFE! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!"
3) Get some vodka. Or tequila. Squeeze the lemons in. You now have Happy Hour. Thanks, Life.
4) Demand to see Life's manager and ask why you keep getting these lemons.
5) Donate the lemons to a soup kitchen. (Bonus points for civic duty!!!!)
6) Commit arson. Lemons, as it turns out, are flammable.
7) If you're Natasha Romanoff, kill Life with lemons. You are now master of everything.
8) If you're Loki, just say that you do what you want and you're trying to get a date with Death anyway. She said that you could hang out if you make subordinates of enough humans. Life will feel embarrassed and try to take back the lemons. DO NOT RETURN THE LEMONS. Keep them and scoff at Life. Life will be really sad. Suck on that, Life! (The lemons are pretty sour, huh?)
9) You could just give up.
10) NUMBER 9 IS NOT AN OPTION, BECAUSE YOU ARE AWESOME AND WILL NEVER SURRENDER YOUR RIGHTS (OR YOUR LEMONS, BECAUSE YOU DID SOMETHING BAD ENOUGH TO GET THEM, SO NOW YOU HAVE THEM AND YOU'RE GONNA KEEP 'EM, DAMMIT!)
I am not Natasha, even though I could kill someone with a lemon (basic training, dude). T..." http://wattpad.com/story/2483299
