Upon the revelation of someone I really admire on youtube, I've deleted a bunch of my fics.
While I am incredibly proud of Dan Howell, and I am so happy that he feels he can finally share this with us and feel secure in it, it also reminds me of some things that I wrote in my younger years.
I'd like to apologize, even though he will never see it, for what had to border on or actually be fetishization. I was young, and I didn't quite see him or Phil as people the way that I do now, which came with time, and growing up into my own Queerness. And I am sorry that I did that.
It's been years since I've actively been in the phandom, and I think that's for the better, I've (as I said before) grown out of that in my life now. But with this realization, it feels wrong to keep the fics that I wrote about him and Phil up where they can be read, or on my account at all.
To end this little (probably into the void) apology, though, I am genuinely so proud of him. And I am so proud of them both for coming out and saying their truth in the way they feel safe to. I'm so happy for you, Dan and Phil.
