Anvesha Deshmukh

V4v

We met—it was an accident,
          But I thought you'd be my favorite incident.
          I never knew life could be this cruel,
          Yet the love we shared was painfully real.
          
          Our destinies crossed like strangers passing by,
          And I never noticed our last goodbye.
          You stood beneath the silver moonlight,
          Dressed in white, so still, so bright.
          
          Oh my dear, I promise we’ll meet again—
          Because you, my angel, I still love in heaven.
          Though our love was black, deep and true,
          So many words were left between me and you.
          
          -
          Anvesha
          12:44 AM
          19.04

What if I get caught in the turbulence of my mind
          Trying to change the thoughts, waiting for someone to find.
          
          How long do I have to wait
          for the answers
          My mind playing games 
          Asking myself, will I ever be the same?
          
          I got caught in the maze
          Trying to untangle the threads
          The voices grow louder,
          can I escape this haze?
          
          In silence of night
          In the darkness of my mind
          Moon being my friend 
          Asking myself again, will I ever be the same?
          
          - Anvie
          Aug 4,2024
          11:59 PM
          

Trapped.
          
          At this point, I don't even understand whom to listen to. People give advice based on the version of me they have in their minds. Some see me as strong and mature, while others see a weak and childish version. Then there are those who simply judge without truly knowing me.
          
          I feel like I'm caught in the chaos of these voices, knowing I can't easily escape them. It's like I'm running from my original self, trapped inside my own subconscious. My body has already given up, but my mind is restless, churning with thoughts and worries. What if I can't escape these voices and get stuck? What if the anxiety takes over, again?
          
          I'm scared of being trapped in this cycle, where every effort to move forward feels like dragging a weight behind me. I just want to find some peace, to feel like myself again without all these conflicting voices tearing me apart. I want to believe that I can break free, that there's a way out of this mental maze, but right now it feels so hard to see a clear path.

And it's time for our farewell,
          
          Two pairs of shoes two pairs of dress
          School bag was heavy but there was no stress
          
          waking up was hard dressing up pain
          
          Late to assembly, eyes searching for the gang
          Smile meant High five, lips read slang
          
          Classroom felt like jail, waiting to escape
          Eyes on the clock waiting for Bell, our heart agape.
          
          The final bill rang, we walked out of the class 
          looking back memories like shadows pass
          
          Oh my dear school, with memory so bright 
          forever in our heart shining with light.
          
          -Anvie

Ok so I got another which I'll start writing from 27th of March and maybe will keep Last November on hold or will archive it. Or chances are there that I can update it alternately.
          
          But here is the teaser,
          
          "For all the girls who met a boy at a wedding but never had the chance to talk, this is for you."

So finally I am writing this book!!!
          Go check it out;)
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/327243553

Something spicy is on the way;)
          
          "What are you doing?"
          "Enjoying our time"
          "You are so bad. So bad"
          "Why?"
          "I am not ready"
          "Then let me just kiss you till you are ready"

Your book is great. Keep going!

It's that phase of my life again where I want to stay alone, away from this world, just me and my thoughts. I want to disappear for a while and ghost everyone I know till the time I feel I am fine. But deep down I want that one person to be with me in my alone time. To hear my thoughts. To comfort me when I cry. But I knew that that person won't come because the reason for me being lonely again is the same person:)