Arsonist-in-the-void

Anyone ever look back on a memory on what someone said and the realise how aphobic/homophobic/transphobic it was cause that just happened to me

So I just thought about how my countries education system is probaby insane to other countries (maybe not) because we have literal 12 year olds doing engineering, woodwork using drill, saws and stuff like that oh and you have in my art class dipping photographic paper in chemicals to see how the light changes it (this was from the new art teacher too my guy is like 20) is this normal in your countries because it's normal in mine (except the art one I don't think that's normal)

Pinterest has sent me about 3 'someone on Pinterest is concerned for your wellbeing' emails and I'm not kidding when I say that's more than my parents over the last few years (like genuinely meaning it) so yeah not fun
          
          Also LGBTQ club has not been updated because I SWEAR TO WHATEVER EXTERNAL FORCE ABOVE THAT EXISTS (IF THERE IS ONE) MY LAPTOP IS BEING A PIECE OF SH!T THAT THING IS ON LIFE SUPPORT I SWEAR but I'm getting my new laptop in a week or two so all is good so yeah

I think I'm losing myself and my friends and it's all my fault for going to tell them my issues! I feel like it's back then all over again but worse, why is it that every time friends abandon me it's always worse each time? I don't know but I hate it

While I was explaining to my sibling why I don't like disco's (flashing lights, too much people, loud noises, etc) they looked at me and asked if was autistic then proceeded to say because I think you are when I said I never got a test for it. This also happened when I mentioned the main reason I don't like alot of food was because of texture not me being a brat they said the same thing 
          It's quite funny

What are the odds that Pinterest asks me if I'm okay before my friends (my friends aren't bad people and this just proves that my 'I have no issues for you to worry about' mask is working even my parents don't ask anymore!) Also yes the LGBTQ club will be getting an update once I deal with my laptop issues I have the chapters written just no way to publish them

Well first day in a new school and I'm not in the same main class as my only friend, but we don't know the classes for different subjects yet so I can still have hope but all went well except for not being able to speak at times but nobody was trying to talk to me at those times, I talked to a few SNA's I hope I can talk to people in my year aswell soon

... tomorrow is school wish me luck and mental stability I'll need it to not forget how to talk within five seconds of being there

Summer break is almost over welp atleast next year I'll be getting 3 months of summer break instead of 2

I have retainers because of braces and I have them in the cleaning water thingy (water mixed with the denture cleaning tablets) and I was thinking what if I drunk it I also had a glass of water so then I put my glass of water next to me AND I KID YOU NOT I LITERALLY SAID TO MYSELF "see this is why this works I won't accidentally drink the cleaning solution" then I picked up a glass and DRUNK THE FLIPPING CLEANING SOLUTION YOU CAN NOT MAKE THIS SHIT UP