Fae-In-May

Oh my gosh it’s been so long. Hruuuu

School hasn't even started yet and she's already stressing me out. I can't wait to move out, and Ik ppl are always like, oh, you shouldn't say that, you'll miss them, but I'm SO TIRED of having nothing for myself both physically and emotionally. like wth I'm literally only 15 and ik that sounds dumb or whatever but can you PLEASE cut me at least a little bit of slack? My mom's always talking about how she stayed and done her literal job as a parent when she could've given up and went  lived her life and I high-key wished she did cause then I wouldn't be in this situation.

My mother cannot be real. She just can't. I just argued with her over Diddy's acquittal. First that freaking orange and now this. How do I stay sane?

Book rant & life update!
          
          GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS! 
          I am in the middle of Onyx Storm and I have not stressed this much over a book in forever. The amount of times I've gone "Rebecca slow down" is simply unfathomable. Everybody is dying except the people that need to die and there needs to be a freaking cure for venin and everything needs to be alright with the world because the MMC and our FMC are hopelessly desperately in love and they deserve a future together and I almost cried. (I did cry.) 
          
          Anyways aside from the emoitional turmoil that is well-written literature, I met this amazing girl in like, March and we've been chatting ever since, and omg life is sm better when you have someone to pine? over ig, and all the messages she sends are so sweet and I've showed them to my friends and they're all like, "Faith, shoot your shot" GUYS I am NOT, I repeat NOT, the shot shooter. We've called and stuff and omg I almost forgot she called me my love and has been sending me love songs and called me one of the best this to ever happen to her and I somehow managed to continue asking myself if she likes me :) Idk, ik I haven't been on here in a min but what do we think and how are we doing?

HELP-
          How do I differentiate platonic feelings from romantic feelings?

ALSOOOO (I wasn't done) did I mention I'm bi and shes homophobic asf? I'm THRIIIIIVING OVER HERE and she had decided to accuse me of being what I am. I denied, of course, because I would rather not be killed by my own mother. but whatever ig its not even important anymore.
          
          Side note: 1 day left to 1 year clean!

Fucking kill me I can't do this shit anymore I wanna go and I wanna go now. How does one call themselves a mother and proceed to say the most horrible things and  expect you to stay silent? I spent the last two hours in actual HYSTERICS because of my mother.  SHE NEVER listens to me, and I'm pretty sure I passed out from hyperventilation. She didn't care. She threatened to ship me off to Texas to my father (he left and I barely know the dude) She looked me dead in my face while I was crying and picked up a chair to throw at me :) Why am I even here? I don't wanna be here anymore I'm tired asf. School is wonderful because of my friends, it's the grades and teachers that are stressing me out. I think my grades are considerably okay, but my Spanish and math teachers need to be fired. My Spanish teacher is the scary type of crazy and then my math teacher is actually clueless she don't know how to teach. ALSO my theology teacher is like, the weird type of crazy. My mother found this app on my phone called locket and it's literally harmless but she looked at one of my friends and called them gay.

Random Life Update 'Cause I Feel Like It:
          
          I started HS and it's going great, my friends are amazing (I love them so much) They're literally so sweet and I have the same schedule as one of the girls, so I have one person who's in ALL of my classes. And my other friend is such a sweetheart, and also she's so real, and yk when you find your people and you can actually just be goofy asf without feeling judged? We (My friend group) just laugh and laugh and today I chased my friend around like she was a toddler like, twice, once cause I made friend dough (we were at lunch) and she dropped it (on the floor) and picked it back up and I was like "oh no honey put it down please don't eat that", and the second time was cause she picked up one of the torches from the lawn, and I went to grab her but she ran :(    and ohmygosh she's short but she's so fast and she dances and I dance and we sat in the library watching restocking videos together, and she was like, and and I do her hair like, all the time and speaking of running, I'm on the Cross Country team and it hurts to walk cause shin splints and old lady knees and ankle pain (but oh my gosh the leg muscles are there people). And HOCO is coming up and the theme is tangled/fairytale. Also, let's hope I make it through this month, cause then I'll be ONE YEAR CLEAN. How are y'all doing?

Heyyy
          I haven't heard from u in a while everything okay?

HEYYYYY! I'M ALIVE, HOW YALL DOING?