Wtf is my life

Celia: Callum Hunt is EVIL, Jasper! He’s Constantine Madden, the Enemy of Death!
          Jasper, my icon: C’mon Celia! He’s more like the Frenemy of Death, I promise
          Celia: I’m leaving you
          Jasper: damn ok
          Call: for me 

I NEED TO INFO DUMP DON’T READ IF U DON’T WANT SPOILERS FOR THE FOLLOWING SERIES! My new favorite book series is the Magisterium series. It’s more unhinged than Percy Jackson (which is saying something). There’s three main characters: Callum Hunt, who has a shattered leg and also everyone hates him because he’s kind of a dick, which fucks him over when he finds out that the big bad put his soul in Call to save his own life. Tamara Rajavi, a badass and also technically the love interest but she’s Call’s friend first. Aaron Stewart, the golden retriever bestie and also a makar, which means he has scary chaos magic and also he dies and then stops being dead in a new body. There’s also Jasper, who’s an ableist dickbag in the first book but becomes nicer after Tam, Aaron, and Call kidnap him in the second book. He’s my favorite character. Call gets arrested at the end of the third book, and Jasper visits him in the fourth book to vent about his girlfriend leaving him. It’s later revealed that his girlfriend thinks Call is evil because he’s got the soul of the big bad, and she made Jasper choose her or Call. HE CHOSE CALL I LOVE HIM. He complains, and he’s not very nice, but he and Call become genuinely close and I love him and their friendship SO MUCH

Hello! Really sorry for disturbing you but i would be sooooooo much happy if you gave me a chance and had a look at this story. Its a comic book, webcomics. If you read it, hope you like it. Anyway God bless you. ❤️ Have a nice day!
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/402739224?utm_source=ios&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details&wp_uname=bookywormy2

Hi there. I was hoping you might consider checking this story out
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/403970439?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=share_reading&wp_page=reading&wp_uname=RedFox5467

HIHII U SEEM COOL

Hey guys what in the actual fuck is Michael Sheen

I thought Good Omens was a cute little show about a cute little angel and his demon boyfriend who’s secretly soft, but it’s actually about a cute little angel and his demon boyfriend who’s NOT AT ALL subtle about his softness, but with sad and I don’t like sad 

Just cleaned up two piss puddles from my elderly dog who’s kidneys are failing then I accidentally knocked over a plant and the pot it was in smashed all over the floor and I swear to god I’ll have a breakdown if one more thing happens-

In my Big Time Rush era and I’ve become emotionally attached to Carlos “attached to his hockey helmet in a way that is nowhere near neurotypical” Garcia. I took one look at that corn dog obsessed freak and said “pikachu, I choose you!”
          Also:
          -Logan is pookie (and also super horny for Camille)
          -Kendall’s element of harmony is “I don’t give a shit about your opinion”
          -James has better lashes than me and I’m jealous
          -Kelly is literally carrying, give the girl a break 
          -Griffin should be in prison because he wouldn’t delete that video clip where Kendall’s swim trunks fell down (Bro is a MINOR and y’all refused to delete a clip showing his asscrack? PRISON!!)

My dad to me to contribute to the household today. I was like yeah sure, also did you know people ship Draco and Harry from Harry Potter?
          Then my dad looked at me for a long time and said “that’s the opposite of what I just told you to do”