In the middle of my late night thoughts. Part of me says you did the right thing, part of me says don't be too hard to yourself.
Part of me is asking, "Am i really too hard to myself?" then part of me is also asking "Why do i end up messing up the whole plan?"
Part of me reminds me "You are turning 24 next month, you are adulting again. Don't waste your time on smt that's not part of your growth." Also part of me reminds me, "24 is still young, be sure to take a break and enjoy."
Welcome to my adulting life.
Where both of my side to side choices makes sense, you have to consider that both matters, that in order for you to do this two things, you can't stop.
Because once you do, you just don't messed up the other one. You will ruin both at the same time.
That's why right now? Instead of deciding what should come first, i decided to choose both by sacrifing my own comfort. And honestly? It's bored as fudge.
So boring that I can't stop myself thinking about how's everyone? Should i download my social apps again?
But— i remember. There is something i need to do for me to experience both of my choices and that always put me back to my place.
So this is not a rant, this is simply a random message to myself and to every eldest daughter who hustles so much, fighting y'all