Jakob <3

I'm so fucking done with my meds they don't even work and they're not coming out with a new version anytime soon they don't even know what my current one will do bc It's some experimental shit and I feel like some sort of lab rat testing their new formula

Lmao imagine getting robbed from a hookup 
          
          HE TOOK A BAR OF SOAP WHAT

Hi! I'm checking up on all my followers. Just wanna make sure you're doing alright and thank you for staying a follower of mine. I hope you're well! 
          
          Also wanted to let you know that I'm back. Sorry for being gone so long.

My gay, amazing child

hello fellow older sibling (are you alright?)

**proud of u**

HI CHILD

... I woke up. IN THE HOSPITAL. Okay, killing myself didn't work out, so wtf do I do now? I have no idea. Why wouldn't they let me die? Why wouldn't they let me? Fuck you again Axel for finding me like 3 mins after. 
          
          I think this is a new chapter in my life. I don't feel like I'm gonna be the same. Will I ever be able to just like feel the adrenaline course through my veins the way it did last night? Maybe my life is trying to tell me suicide isn't the answer? I don't know what to do. Idk if anyone's gonna care but.. I don't care I've like vented 2 times in my life :/ 

Since that @yourstruly-_ has adopted you too that means you are my sibling!
           
          I don't know your gender so I will only call you my sibling. Also.. Are you my older and younger sibling? (I am 15 btw)
          
          Anyway! Since you are now my new sibling, I love you!(platonic obviously) Have a nice day/evening/night^^!!

Haha Wattpad ain't for me 
          
          ...
          
          Tbh I can't keep myself hidden anymore 
          
          You might've talked to me 
          
          And thought "wow this dude seems like they've got something good going on in their life" 
          
          Honestly it's not me 
          
          I'm tired of this life 
          
          I'm tired of having to keep up with everything irl 
          
          I've been through so much and I've been trying to cover it up with laughs, sarcasm, sillyness, or just being a total... Freak. :/ 
          
          I'm not gonna go into detail but... I just really hate everything about me. My skin. My ears. My arms. Me. My life. The things I do. It's all so fucking ew to just live with. 
          
          I hate my family. Not that I contact them. I hate my friends. I've been cheated on. My heart's been broken more than 10 times. Per guy. 
          
          I can't seem to learn from my mistakes. 
          
          I'm in a circle of... Wanting real affection but picking the wrong guy, or the wrong way.
          
          I feel like a rag. Looked down upon because they're a dirty thing no one asked for. 
          
          I can't find anything meaningful even. 
          
          I don't wanna do this anymore.
          
          I wanted to celebrate my birthday. But I can't wait over 5 months. I can't wait. To fall down into the darkest pits of hell. 
          
          So you know. Beneath this mask of a wacky and happy dude, it's just pure... An accident. A disappointment.
          
          Btw fuck you Axel I thought we actually had something healthy. 
          
          Bye bye people.
          
          Bye bye everyone.
          
          Bye bye life./Jakob.