Bacononly

So I just posted Chapter 1 of my new story Gullible and i would appreciate it if any of you could take a look at it (you don't have to though). This is my first story and its the first chapter so it is a little rough and not all that good or perfect. If you do read it make sure to read the Authors note. Also if you could comment some feed back on what you think about it that would be lovely. I don't mind criticism and would love any tips you all have. Thanks for your time xxx