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Hey guys... I honestly am having a bad day and most likely will end up regretting saying all of this but that's future me's problem so fuck it. I just need somebody who doesn't pretend to be my friend or pretend to love me... what's so wrong with me that makes me so unlovable..? Is it because I'm not attractive? Maybe I just have a shit personality and don't realize it... Am I bad...? Why do they always pretend... I know that I have @Slxtty_E-gxrl_Sho but I'm still hurting... I feel so selfish... there are so many people that have it so much worse than me... I have a dad and stepmom who both love me, I have a few good friends, I have my beautiful princess, But it still isn't enough for me... I want more friends.. Ones that aren't fake who won't turn their back on me once they realize that I'm useless.. I want people who love me like my dad does I want somebody to hug me and tell me that it's okay... I want somebody who won't pretend to be in love with me for three months only to find out that they've been sexting your best friend's boyfriend.... why wasn't I good enough for her...? I just wanted to make her happy... I just wanted to hold her and tell her that everything was alright like I need somebody to do too me... I wanted her to love me and I thought she did but she didn't... I want to have people that don't want anything from me other than my friendship... I hate that she stole from me... I have her money, hoping it would make her stay.... she still left... I'm an idiot... I'm so so stupid and worthless and ugly and I hate it... I hate myself... I just want to end it... but I'm too much of a coward... I'm a coward.. a stupid fat coward who's too scared to make her happy... Why can't I make her happy... she would be happy if I just ended it right...? That's what she wanted right...? Why else would she have hurt me...? Would she feel regret if I did it? Would she finally care...? Would she notice that I'm human...? I just miss her.... I want her to love me......
