Help I'm

Officer: "have you had anything to drink tonight sir?"
          
          Me putting on my american flag sunglasses and putting the car in gear: "wouldn't be here if I hadn't buddy"

"Non-lethal", yeah right, anything's lethal in the hands of an insane man

Playing geometry dash in the shower is an experience everyone should try

Nuclear winter, my beloved ♥️ (that's the cat's name)

If god didn't want me to fuck a guy then why did he invent femboys?

Me: dude, are you real?
          
          Him: I... I think I am?
          
          Rene Decartes: that's actually some pretty solid evidence
          
          Us: RENE DECARTES????

Waow!!!! Tiddies!!!!! Yipeeeeee!!!!!!!!

We need to normalize giving head to your friends fr

What the hell are we making white women out of these days? Y'all got no business being this thick

Some people would really rather stop and think instead of top a twink and it shows