Solver of the Absolute Fabric

This meme cracked me up @Biscuitbites_Enjoyer, so funny: 
          https://sites.google.com/view/y35h34yh?q=772473

Greetings.
          
          On the 28th day of the first month of 2023. You wrote on my message wall,
          "@thinking_of_name I'm sorry, I can help with this NEW ROBLOX EPIC JUICE?1?!1!?1!???1!1?1?1???
          GET IT HERE AT:
          
          123robloxmerch.notascam.net/roblox-epic-juice"
          
          It has been 598 days since I received that fateful message.
          Ever since, day after day, my mind has been occupied with acquiring this sacred juice you speak of. 
          But never once have you responded.
          Today, I have infiltrated your profile as one, final attempt at obtaining this drink.
          
          Give.
          Me.
          The.
          Juice.
          

imma be real with you I genuinely read 'biscuit bites' as 'biscuit bitties' and my face was like 

To everyone in the Marcy Wu pfp club:
          
          I am officially leaving the club to make my profile murder drones themed. I hope you can understand :^

OML HELP ME
          
          I've been falling down a pit of Murder Drones and I need fanfics. Fast
          
          I need something to help me distract myself before I attempt to write a stupid biscuitbites (N x Uzi) story that I'll forget about within 3 days. 
          
          Idc if it's on Wattpad or Ao3, I just need the fanfics. If you could, send a link with the name of the story and I'll check it out. 
          
          If none of y'all are able to find anything good. I'll go digging in the trenches of the md fandom by myself :^

Thx so much for the follow! I hope you find my content enjoyable!! <3333

Hi
          To all of the people waiting for their oc drawing, I'll try to get it done soon. I haven't properly slept in 10 days and need some more rest before I'm ready. I hope you can understand ^^

Yo
          To everyone waiting for me to draw their oc, I promise I'll do it soon. I just have school and I also have a small character design job for a discord server focused on making stuff. 
          
          Since the weekend is almost here, I'll have a lot more free time to draw stuff. I'll get it done soon, I promise

Though, you background picture is really making me crack up. LOOK AT HIS OLD FACE! HAHA! Lol

I REACHED 100 FOLLOWERS! WOOOOO
          
          This is a huge milestone for me. Looking back, I realize that I just started out as a random person reading fanfics on here. It's been a blast, and I hope you enjoy the stuff I post in the future. Have a great day/afternoon/night ^^