I know this might sound like whining, and that my life is luxury compared to what some people go through, but it's hard for ME.
I'm just tired of living, but I don't want to die either. I'm tired of being someone who I'm not, I'm tired of constantly lying to everyone just so I can feel like I "belong" only to get tossed away like a used paper plate. I genuinely have no talents, or interests, or anything to be a part of. And my social skills are so horrible, I'm scaring away people I meet instantaneously. And the worst part is, I have no one to vent about it. I don't have a single friend and talking to my parents stresses me out more than anything. I hate the fact that my mom got a new boyfriend and that I have to lie to my dad about what happens with my mom and lie to my mom about what happens with my dad. I don't understand why my parents have to hate each other so much, and why can't they be cool with each other like every other divorced marriage I've ever come across. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep every night like a stuck up baby and not getting enough sleep to go through the day. In tired of bawling my eyes out at random things that aren't even sad. I'm tired of just sitting in my room all day crying like I have no life. Usually people with no friends are at least smart. I'm not. My parents both told me many times they are ashamed to call me their daughter. If they hate me so much to say that to me, what chance do I have making friends with anyone else? I'm tired of being jealous whenever I see everyone talking with their groups of friends. I'm tired of when I don't understand an assignment or need help studying, I'm the only one without someone to turn to. I hate that huge mirror in my room. I hate looking at my reflection. I know these are all minor concerns and people deal with so much worse, but I'm just tired of life
