Ok little sis. Here is what I have to say about your first published novel. Sorry in advance
1. It's to speech related. There is not enough description. What does she look like? Her mom? Her dad? Etc.
2. The story is to fast paced. You just jump right in without any build up. Not giving any of your readers a chance to get into it. There heads are spinning to much from whip lash
3. There are a lot of loop holes that you could address if u slowed the story down. Like why her adoptive parents split and how her and her friend Elliot met.
4. You had her completely skip over the fact that she smelled her mate. She takes a Whiff of the air and then completely ignores it. Most werewolf chicks tend to freak out or panic the first time they smell their mate
5. What is your character like? What's her favorite food, color, animal, etc.? Her favorite book/tv show? What is her major character flaw? And so on so forth.
These are just a few of the points I wanted to point out to you. I don't want to come off mean or anything, but as your big sis I thought you might take my tips into consideration going forward. I will be happy to help any way you want. Love u bunches! Good work so far. Keep it up and work on getting even better.
