this message may be offensive
Hey bbg.
I have my first proper crush and I can't share it with you. Idk why but I feel lonely sometimes. Gosh. How's heaven up there? I miss you so much. We could've been ranting about our classes if you were still here. I would've still been swimming if you were here. I miss you so fucking much. I just can't imagine how your family must be feeling. I hate the c word with my entire heart although sometimes I wish it gets to me. I don't want it anymore. I wanna live. I just don't have any purpose. Maybe I'll find it soon.
Anyway, away from the depressing thoughts. This guy oh my gosh, i should be hating him but literally, even my friends must know that he's the crush
So, here's what happened. He used to stare alot before he changed groups. I used to bitch about him buttt the minute he changed his groups, he became my hallway crush cuz I see him in hallways. Like, a week ago, we were told to temporarily sit in the class opposite to his due to some renovations in ours. I'm the kinda girl who lives to roam around so i roamed and I see him. My friends notice that he stares and I do too. Anddd, idk why the hell but I started to go out just to see him. A few days ago, i told my friend that I have a crush but never told his name knowing they'll tease the f out of me. They already do. So, she asked me if they're from our class, i obviously said no. She thought and literally asked his name and i denied it so fast bro. She was like, be fr and I was like, yeah I'm fr. Today, they started again cuz my ahh decided to let my entire friend group know and they told his name and my dumbahh blushed and they noticed brooo ahhh. Anyway, I said he isn't from our college. I regret it ngl. I wanna tell them but I just don't know how to admit it. The next time they bring it up, I'll tell them but they'll tease me even I just want to go out of the class. Whatever, I'll tell them next time. He's cute bro. Honestly.
I don't have words left so sparkles!
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