AnonymousBFF

I'm sorry, I offended you with my comment, didn't I?
          I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything by it, but you do have a Mary Sue on your hands and I really do hope for you to change that by listening. So please hear me out, for you. 
          You really do need to give your character some flaws, and try and not talk about beautiful your character is or what's she wearing, that will help so much!
          I really do care about you, even if you think you don't know me, you do. I will be cheering for you however things turn out. But it pains me to see your story with only 9 views while 2 of your other friends have over 100 each. So please listen to me, Kensley.

AnonymousBFF

I want to help. 
          Your story has potential but your characters seem to be suffering the traits of a Mary Sue. 
          A Mary Sue is a character that is perfect in many ways. It is best to not switch POVs just to hear how pretty she is. Also is good not to describe her too much. Then, maybe also try and give her a few flaws, that will help tremendously with your story, know wants to read about someone perfect, they want to relate to them. Also, try and slow down relationships, they happen slowly.
          This is advice, you do not have to take it. I wish you best of luck
                                     -AnonymousBFF