Hello po! I just want to say that I really enjoyed reading your story entitled "Mario". Sobrang ganda ng story and yung plot na ginawa mo.., some are very unpredictable, kaya nakakaexcite syang basahin and tapusin.
Pero as an avid reader, I just want to suggest a few things that may help your writing. Nanotice ko po kasi na very confusing sa part na nagswiswitch ka ng POV ng mga character kasi hindi nakaindicate kung kanino/sino yung may POV na yun. Much better po if lagyan mo ng Name ng character yung POV para hindi sya confusing samin mga reader.
Apart from that, wala na din akong masyadong masuggest except sa few typos though given naman na din yun... Pero yung change ng pov lang tlaga main issue ko.. Aside from that wala na, kasi like what I've said the story is so beautiful and I really na marami pa ang maka appreciate sa mga stories mo.
Lastly, I just want to say na good work! Sobrang na appreciate ko yung story mo kasi napaka wholesome nya for me... Thank you and more beautiful stories to come. :)