Nothing like having panic attack after panic attack for nearly 24 hours, maybe even more. Panic disorder flares are some of the absolute worst things ever, the rolling attacks are pure torture. No triggers or anything, just... there.
I hope no more come around today, that was insane yesterday. :'(
Putting my vulnerability out here again, but man this disorder is an absolute monster, I can't say it enough. I wouldn't wish it on anyone at all. I hope it's truly nothing more than a bad flare, the fear in my mind was terrible. It hurts just recalling this stuff...
The after effects leave someone tiptoing and walking on eggshells type feeling afterwards, fearing of triggering another attack. It's not fair having that in the back of your head. Living in fear of something that should be seen more often, like, "truly" seen and understood better. Because very few providers understand the disorder, and it's hard finding a good one and to even talk about mental health without getting scared about it. Without the fear of being forced to see a psychiatrist who will probably not understand and force you into crap and make you feel worse.
We didn't ask for this type of disorder, and I wish I could send mine packing permanently.
