Here we are again... a year after i said I would stop writing fanfiction... Its my 19th birthday today... i finished college for fucks sake.
Ok whatever. We need to talk.
I was hoping I could move on from fanfiction but its harder than I thought. I just feel like I am not good enough. As if my work is only good enough in a fanfiction way.
But, God, sometimes it makes me so uncomfortable to write. Because I know it are real people, I know it will weird them out when they see this. Maybe I don't write smut, but its still weird. I always make sure to never kill their friends/family, never write them having sex. Because even implying it makes me feel bad.
My whole platform is based on fanfiction and it saved my life back in high school. I dont want to go into detail, but making up a word and story to hide in made it better. I think that's why I'm so attached to it?
I am really not going to say 'writing fanfiction is wrong!' What would be egoistic of me. If you write it, and read it, keep in mind it are real people with real feelings.
Right now I will finish Kiss Of Fame and then I don't know what I will do. I really want to write LGBT stuff. Educating people about it really makes me feel good.
I want to write about transgender people again, but me being a cis woman makes my doubt if I should. I know a lot about it, I educate myself. But I never experienced it. Expierence is much more important than education.
So the only thing I can really talk about it sexuality. So many people are writing about it right now, so i will see what I can do. An idea just popped in my head actually, maybe I can make that work... I don't know.
I really hope I can move on from fanfiction and you guys will still support me...