Inika

                 
                                    Into You (Autumn Leaves) 
          
          
          
          V1- You're the book I open but I don't know what page to choose 
          The way at times, almost differently, each chapter speaks to you 
          So close, the seat you chose when you didn't even have to choose?
          Feels like I've got too much on the line to lose,I hate being into you 
          
          
          V2- You're the flame that extinguishes right before it burns 
          The way at times, you're healed, before you're hurt enough 
          So funny, the tilts of your chair, words you'd like me to hear?
          Feels like I've got some grounds to measure what's sincere 
          
          
          PC- Love, you're close to me, but not close 
          enough
          Like the whispering crackle of the autumn 
          leaves 
          Love, you're far away, but not far enough to disappear 
          Like the wind that touches in ways one 
          can't see 
          
          
          C- I love how you're into me (Maybe)
             But I hate how it feels being into you 
            Cause I never know what to do(Really)
             I've always been too much in control 
          
          
          
          PC- And how it feels*2 , I-I can't comprehend too well 
          And how it feels*2, Uh-I-I read 
          into things too much 
          (Love, I don't know what to trust)
          (So embarrassing)
          (Love, oh were you even really there?)
          (So, apocryphal)
          
          
          C- I love how you're into me (Maybe)
             But I hate how it feels being into you 
            Cause I never know what to do(Really)
             I've always been too much in control 
          
          
          
          Love Love 

Hey everyone, 
          This is a really personal song. For someone as guarded as me, even in terms of my writing, sharing this feels like growth. I hope it hits!! :) 
               
          
          
                                          Abundant L.O.V.E 
          
          
          V1- I've been drawing some stars around my scars lately 
          Would be kinda sweet to have somebody kiss em really 
          Guess I need no medicine, just love as deep as my scars 
          That doesn't fade away when there's no light of the day 
          
          V2- When I look beyond compatability, it's responsibility, I see
          Kinda hard to find, both flames and firewood, near one tree 
          And since I'm a burning flame, a drowning wave, I collide 
          To know, I'd shatter, cause my stars 
          seem to unlikely, to align 
          
          PC- I find love in all places 
                  But how it feels to have 
                  Just one heart aligned 
                   I might never know 
          
                  I can't settle in nice place 
                   A place who isn't home 
                    Got no nomadic desires 
                    But I might adopt
          
                  I think of mimicking em 
                   But that ain't who I am 
                   It doesn't fill me up 
                    And I'm empty still 
          So I..
          
                 -
          
          C- Try to love like me
               To bump into a love like mine 
               Try to touch a heart 
               To give it all the love I've got 
               The love you want 
               Is the kinda love you give to all 
          
          
          Bridge- (A-bundance, A-bundance, A-a-a yeah-uh-uhm)
          Would you get it*2  (tell me) or would you not? 
          (A-romatic, A-romantic, A-a-a, yeah-da-uh-m)
          Oh you love me dear*2(tell me) or would you not?
          
          
          C- Try to love like me
               To bump into a love like mine 
               Try to touch a heart 
               To give it all the love I've got 
               The love you want 
               Is the kinda love you give to all....
          
          Love Love 
          

Hey everyone, 
          
          I just wanted to say that this is probably the most vulnerable song I've written so far, I won't further explain it, but writing it felt liberating– it's open to interpretation, take whatever version of it that feels close to your heart  :). 
          
                                             Speak My Truth 
          
          V1- I've grown up hearing things other people don't hear 
          I've hidden all that I know cause I know they would fear 
          I've weighted me and I'm the loneliest person
           I know 
          Is it a blessing or a curse? cause all my life's been a show 
          
          V2- To see things, the way people don't see ( yes, I figured already)
          Not superior, I feel inferior, so fake for being me (I like playing dumb)
          Now my mind's in chaos and I might aswell face it (My brain's worn)
          Now my soul's empty and there is not much I can do to feed it (be it)
          
          
          PC- They can say I've got it all, but it all makes me upset 
          I'm slacking off on purpose, my soul might get desireless 
          Is it another episode perhaps, will I be sent to hell again?
          Or would my karmic bubble evaporate into nothingness 
          
          
          C- Somebody, teach me 
                How to keep my body still?
                Somebody, teach me 
                I want to be a child again?
                Somebody, teach me
                I want to speak my truth?
                (Without being called crazy to)
          
          
          Bridge-
           People might think,
           I think I'm better than anyone else.
           (superior.. in a sense that makes sense )
          
          People might think, 
          They know what it is, inside my head.
          (I do feel superior in that sense, if it makes sense)
          
          This world plays as the word play
          Goes on and on into your mind.....
          
          I wanna be human ( in a "sense")
          But I'm too attached to even wake up
          And not be me (to not "sense")
          
          
          (No one would like to get this song...if they felt it the way I did )
          
          
          C- Somebody, teach me 
                How to keep my body still?
                Somebody, teach me 
                I want to be a child again?
                Somebody, teach me
                I want to speak my truth?
                (Without being called crazy to)
          
          
          Love Love <3
          <3 
          <
          >?
          >3
          

                                    To Love, is To Let Go 
          
          
          Intro- Isn't it selfishness if it's more about your own desires than them?
          
          V1- If it's not what fills his heart, it's not what I want 
          Even if it's me myself, let me break all those 
          walls 
          God draped me in freedom, I kiss away not
           control 
          If it's more about me, perhaps it was never 
          him at all?
          
          V2- My hearts in pieces but there's not much I can do 
          I'm a girl of glass, and there is no way I can paint a new 
          A lover of glass, will love it as is, and he's not 
          "who" 
          Wistles so shrill, I'd have to walk past those 
          shards to 
          
          
          PC- Run on bloody feet on them shards 
                  To perhaps maybe talk to myself 
                   (I don't know why I'm disconnected)
                  But truly god I need your help 
                  I'm so in love with things I don’t get 
                  (I think I need to make ammends)
          
          C-  What doesn't find me, isn't mine...
                  Who doesn't find me love it's you.
                What doesn't love me, it's others...
                  Who doesn't love me, love it's you.
                What doesn't lie in self, it's true love...
                    Who truly loves, learns to let go.
          
          ( Would you call it an act of love if I didn't?)
          
          
          Brideges- There are empty spaces in your heart and love I simply don't fit in 
          I can't scrape your heart with a knife because your red bothers me aswell 
          I'd rather drown in red and let the right piece take it's place perhaps 
          If I'm not meant to be there, I'll find where I fit, call it choices I guess 
          
          
          C-  What doesn't find me, isn't mine...
                  Who doesn't find me love it's you 
                What doesn't love me, it's others...
                  Who doesn't love me, love it's you 
                What doesn't lie in self, it's true love...
                    Who truly loves, learns to let go 
          
          ( Would you call it an act of love if I didn't?)
          

I won 2 more awards T-T 

Hey everyone, 
          
          I’m so lucky and soo grateful right now, for I just received an award from the Ruskin Bond Foundation × Times of India T-T.
          It still feels surreal that the first proper draft of this story was typed right here, on this very platform, ....wattpad truly has been my personal diary, my emotional vomit bin (lol), my lucky place since day one. 
          
          And, not to forget, a huge thank you to my best friend Arsheen, you're my inspo, my comfort, my quiet source of love. You push me out of my comfort zone, I've always hated being in the spotlight but because of you, I'm learning to put myself out there.
          
           I wouldn’t be half of who I am without you.. 
          @summer_sunflower_00 I love you.
          

                       I'm Sorry( I'd always love you)
          
          
          Intro- [voice breaking] Promise me you'd be okay? For me?
          [Machines beeping]
          [Voice echoes] [trembles] What are you even talking about, No- I- u..
          [Weaker wispers] You'd have to find love again...
          [Shivers] , No-, I'm sorr-
          
          V1- Your lips linger on mine, as time takes a
           toll 
          I wish I could pull my lungs out, and replace
           yours 
          You're breathing so slow, I can't take it no
           more 
          Because life without you, isnt one I'm looking
           for 
          
          V2- Now I know why, for me, it's easier to die, than live 
          Why aren't they taking all my blood out through those drips?
          You're so weak I can't see it, "strong" I can no more be it 
          Because the red in my veins, exists only for you love 
          
          
          PC- How can I not die without you?
          ( You're dying)
          How can I be alive without you?
          ( You're no more)
          How can I kiss your tears away? 
          (You're in a grave)
          How can I just call it a day, babe? 
          (Write your name)
          
          (I'm sorry)
          
          C- For even when the sun smiles 
                Or when the dark coulds cry
             I'd never change seasons, my love 
                 For even when the sky's pink 
              Or when it spills colourful drinks 
          I'd never paint a colour, without you 
          
          
          (I'd always love you)
          
          
          Bridge- In a matter of minutes you'd be gone
          Take my heartbeats with you to heaven's door 
          I was no less than a sinner in the arms of an angel 
          You blessed me, and look what I did to you?
          
          
          (I'm sorry..)
          
          
          - For even when the sun smiles 
                Or when the dark coulds cry
             I'd never change seasons, my love 
                 For even when the sky's pink 
              Or when it spills colourful drinks 
          I'd never paint a colour, without you 
          
          (I'd always love you)
          
          
          Love Love 
          

                                         Blue
          
          
          V1-     I kiss my tears away as the sky falls into 
          land 
          And wipe the traces of our footprints from the dry sand 
          The waves are waving back and forth, as I wave goodbye 
          On this journey alone love, I'm yours, but I'm no longer mine 
          
          V2- The way you drown the noise when you speak – you're unpredictable 
          The way your waves can't ever choose a pace, it's almost unethical 
          The way I'm always crawling like I've got no feet, kinda terrible
          See you've got me so wrapped up, my words have turned nonsensical
          
          
          PC- I'm no more than a girl in love 
                  But would we even call it love?
                  We're the waves and the shore 
                  We're together yet I'm blue alone 
          
          
             C- You make me lose it baby 
                 (Just so you know)
                You can be all the good things 
                 (If you recall your vows)
                 But I know you'd never be that 
                  (You like me wearing blue)
          
           (You're just obsessed with how pretty I look in blue)
          
          "Uhm dude he hates yo..."
          
          (It's True, he just likes me wearing blue, You)
          
          
             C- You make me lose it baby 
                 (Just so you know)
                You can be all the good things 
                 (If you recall your vows)
                 But I know you'd never be that 
                  (You like me wearing blue)
          
          
          (What colour are you painting me next?, You)
          (I'm so blue)
          (Blue hues)
          (Blue)
          
          
          
          Love Love 

Thank you for reading my poem! ~<3

                                               Let me go( A little) 
          
          ( I feel like ...
          I wanna wake up...
          As someone else
          ...new perhaps) 
          
          V1- Thoughts spiraling round in circles God I've been a mess 
          Numbing myself out but it never takes a back seat this stress 
           Again I'm left drowning my heart,  hoping for it to breathe 
          Again, I'm left counting minutes till I walk past this scene 
          
          V2-Perhaps I've drawn too many lines on my spine (so divine) 
          Tracing back and forth, yet ending up back at your place 
          Perhaps I'm just trying to weight my empty vessel (so unethical)
          Before my soul, down and up, decides to leave me stuck in yesterday 
          
          [Somebody pull me out, I wanna save myself]
          
          
          PC- Before those branches push against my skin, too deep 
          I'm trying to outrun the cycle of your endless dreams 
          It's now less about you, I believe, perhaps It's more about me 
          Tryna swim up before I'm stupider, than I've always been 
          
          C- Could you hold onto me?
          Or perhaps could you let me go (A little)
          You're standing too close?
          Or perhaps you didn't visit at all ( Um oh)
          
          
          [It's all in my head, I'm gonna save myself]
          
          
          Bridge- They say, things out of hand, are things out of sight 
          Spare me my dignity, my shallow breath, and my time 
          Aiming for some medicine, because I've been too young 
          Too young for an old soul, in Heaven, I might succumb 
          
          [I wanna breathe before I drown don't you get it?]
          
          
          C- Could you hold onto me?
          Or perhaps could you let me go (A little)
          You're standing too close?
          Or perhaps you didn't visit at all ( Um oh)
          
          
          Love Love