@DatPurpleDeer
Just a heads up that I’m gonna start my shift at work soon, so it’ll be about 3 hours until I can reply to anything. Just want to let you know in case you do reply but I don’t respond so that you don’t feel like I am ignoring you or anything. ^^
@WarriorLionstripe no worries ty for being here for me. I will be closing Wattpad now. Thank you for your time
@Y-Studios and @WarriorLionstripe Sorry that you both got dragged into this and anyone else who might have I don't have knowledge of. That is genuinely my fault and I take full responsibility. You both can continue on with your lives and lift this off your chest, no further action is needed. Thank you for being my friends before and and I apologize for disappearing without much notice. It is not for me to say if you stay in contact with him or not, I'm sure your friendship was quite different from mine. I'm not ready to come back to my former relationships and I don't think I ever will after this experience. But I promise I will remember both of you and everyone else fondly. Thank you for checking in and again sorry for this whole mess ^^;. Have a good rest of your day.
@DatPurpleDeer like Lion said, no need to apologize for that. I was (going to be) involved regardless of that thread/happenings, because of my relations to both parties. That couldn't have been avoided. That being said, I am really sorry everything turned out this way. It was never supposed to get this out of hand and I tried interfering at one point (hence me contacting someone as well and the blocking situation), but it wasn't enough. This person also got hurt and I'm so sorry for that. It's completely understandable if you do not want to continue past relations, and if you do, but just not with us, that's understandable too. Regardless, I wish you well. May you find the peace you're looking for and regain healthy friendships you desire. I'll be here in the meantime to make sure this all ends. Untill we meet again, otherwise, take care. <3
And to be honest, I never really close to X. Him and I had a falling out back in 2022 after some shit he said, and I just happened to have been in a position where I was opening up again after a brutal mental health crisis during the same summer, so he caught me at a perfect point where I was willing to take chances and give a second chance.
Putting this here to not give a notification to either X or Y, but it’s entirely fair for why you went dark on everyone, especially X. I really am sorry about everything that has happened, and I do mean it when I say that I will always be by your side, that I will always have your back, regardless if we ever talk again or not. You were among my first friends on Wattpad, and you have always been a good friend at that. What X did, searching for you the way they were, was a clear violation of your privacy.
When you deleted all of your main accounts, I asked Tax and Silver, plus this very account, about it to make sure you were okay. So when Silver clarified that you were okay, I was content with that.
I am sorry about how all this played out, and I am sorry if I ever inadvertently caused you more stress. As always, if you ever need anything from me, I’ll do it without question.
And I forgot to mention it, but I have blocked X on everything, so you more than welcome to say whatever you want on my message board if you don’t want to deal with X replying to you.
When time and personal space was asked, the requests were ignored. Over and over again. What was an unrelated decision became something scary. The multiple accounts, the messages akin to those of a stalker, involving unrelated people. Time was all that was requested. Instead I was hunted down like prey. I promise, it was not personal. But then it was.
I can't forgive someone who harasses someone unrelated multiple times. They shouldn't have ever gone what the have gone through. I can't forgive someone who has weaponized my past relationships against me. I think its best I don't contact them either for the rest of my limited days now. I can't forgive someone who excuses stalking as "being good at looking for information" and joining communities in hopes you'll find what you're looking for. Well you won't. Because the day you harassed that person, it was evident everyone I made connections with would be in danger as well. I have no one close now. I can't let alone close because of you.
My health isn't the greatest right now. I do not know how much time I have. I've been talked out of it countless times, and this is starting to add to it. That's why I've written this message. And I'll repeat myself again. I could never hate anyone. And I stand by that, you are not unique enough to change that, sorry. But I do recognize now that the treatment of other especially and myself were a very shitty thing to do. You are very much aware of it, and no amount of tears or self-loathing messages will open any doors. I hope you feel exposed, because you do need to realize that what you've done is wrong. I cannot have someone who did that in my life. So I make one last request, as the person you once knew. I expect nothing but silence. Genuinely, fuck off. For everyone's wellbeing. The person you knew is long gone, so stop looking.
@DatPurpleDeer And thank you for a closure. I wanted things to be so different and happy for us... Bye-bye
@DatPurpleDeer Thank you, genuinely for talking to me, may it be the last time or not. I uh... in no position to ask what exactly proves your fears right and what they are, but I would honestly appreciate if you could share that. So I would have a better understanding of my downsides. I understand, Flicker. Thank you for these eight years we have spent together. You were so kind, interesting and thrilling. You work so hard on your skills and towards your goals and people you care about. I always admired you and seen as a precious friend. And I was always afraid to mess it all up. Since the very day we started talking again on Discord. Still, I can't comply with your request not to say "Love you", because I do, Flicker, and I did. You know that very well. And I was true about loving you until May, by May I did develop an obssesion due to the stress and paranoia pilling up because of many things I was too scared to share with you. So I do say, that I love you, genuinely, you make me feel the feeling I didn't now exist. It is light, bright, fluffy, shining and warm. I hope you get to feel it in your life too, even though I regret it won't be with me... Be happy outhere, Flicker You were always a free bird, whom I tried to cage despite my original intentions. I will love you for a long time, maybe even until I meet my end. But regardless. Thank you for everything we have been through and what we have in common, it is valuable and helpful to me. I will become a famous musician, so maybe you'd at least treat me as another media person you don't know personally but like their craft, but I don't count on it. I wish we met irl instead of online, since things would be so much drastically different, at least long term... Okay, take care of your family, yourself and friends, trust them, at least more than me. You are a unique person, and I do love you Adios, mi amiguita Ha sido un placer conocerte
@DatPurpleDeer I regret getting her involved. I expected her to simply block me and live on happily. With me knowing I am unwelcome. I know I scared you... I felt like the worst person in the world saying that I would end my life. But let me tell you that. I honestly was about to do that when you disappeared. Because you were the world to me, the only one who listened and heard me. The only one to care about what I said. So when you left, my only motivation to go on in life was gone. But I didn't kill myself because I held on the thought that I would forever lose you if I were to die. Thus I have worked on myself, and towards our common goals during the past half year. I don't dismiss getting irl. Getting irl is dangerous to me due to the political situation, and you know that better than anyone else. I didn't want you to health my sanity, just to be my friend. I am terribly sorry to hear about your mental health... I would've been more thoughtful of you if I were to know about all that... Take care of your health, Flicker. I know life is hard to you, but you are strong. And you are right there.... I just got very anxious after half a year of silence, you know? Someone who genuinely reached you out a lot disappeared. I blamed myself since the very first day you delete your old accounts. I KNEW it was because of me. And I was trying my best to understand why did I became this way and how to avoid it, in hope that you could give me a second chance and that I would make the most of it, not ever daring to ask for another one if I were to fuck up the second one. I am really bad at talking to people, and I don't pick on on the most obvious things.. And I try to get better, I make friends often. It is just, I am really broken deep in my mind and I should get therapy. You were always right about that, and I was too much of a chicken to face my parents about that, because they would put me into a madhoud if I were to tell them I need to visit a therapist...
Your stories are so awesome :D
Thanks all of you who took the time to read Darkstalker's Goodbye, it now sits at 10k reads :0 tysm again
My WOF au on Darkstalker is 2nd out of 284 stories on the tag #darkstalker. It also almost has 6k reads, way more than any other story I have. That's really cool!!! Thanks you guys ^^
do you make your own covers, I do :3
I decided to unpublished two stories and start on rewriting Warriors Cats: Shadows because there is A LOT of grammar issues and kinda off.
Omg I can’t wait for Fallenflowers Prism Of Views
