Deathsloved

For the longest time, I was trapped under the brick of 'undeserved'. The word 'deserve' was so important to me that I rejected affection, love , care that were offered to me in ways more than one or if I accepted, then only on surface. I thought about waiting...doing..being something who could be worthy of being born..or gaining offered love or kindness. Turns out it was a doomed goal when I was already hell bent on regarding ny regrets of past as irredemable or eternal taint.
          	
          	So now I am no longer caring about morality of my acceptance and just wish to do all that remains due and imdulge in as many laughs with others as I can before final collapse.
          	
          	This is not to say deserving or worth is no longer important to me but it is no longer impediment to my choice of taking action. Maybe I am wrong  as I think I am always...but I shall gladly accept its repurcussion in future ...better than forsaking existence entirely .
          	
          	
          	

Aweirdoonearth01

@Deathsloved so true. That feeling always makes you feel down.
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The_Pencraft

@Deathsloved yeah it's going well. My college life is hectic too. There are going to be continuous exams. 
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The_Pencraft

Can't the supreme court make a law?

The_Pencraft

@Deathsloved how far I know people around me want educated politicians but end up saying do you think anyone who is educated will like to be a politician? The answer can be yes if the system changes
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Deathsloved

@The_Pencraft Who decides what is basic? Who decides what is qualificatory? The majority? The threat of majoratarianism and class based exclusion runs too high. Anyway this is one of contenious issue that needs further deliberation and discussion at length
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The_Pencraft

@Deathsloved nah, many of them don't know the national anthem. To run a district qualification is needed but to run a country no qualification is needed. It sounds nonsense to me. You are just handling everything without having proper knowledge or an idea of everything. They lack basic human ethics.
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soulful_sojourner

hai, 
          wassup?
          are ya there on discord or insta ?

soulful_sojourner

@Deathsloved hai hai, reading here, especially the Wretched Life, Yandere's Curse, made me remind of my friend author's style of writing.
            Also i thought maybe y'all could acquaint with so yeah asked about discord/insta 
            do u happen to know if there's groups or know folks who enjoy reading and writing in classic detailed  style on wattpad ?
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Deathsloved

For the longest time, I was trapped under the brick of 'undeserved'. The word 'deserve' was so important to me that I rejected affection, love , care that were offered to me in ways more than one or if I accepted, then only on surface. I thought about waiting...doing..being something who could be worthy of being born..or gaining offered love or kindness. Turns out it was a doomed goal when I was already hell bent on regarding ny regrets of past as irredemable or eternal taint.
          
          So now I am no longer caring about morality of my acceptance and just wish to do all that remains due and imdulge in as many laughs with others as I can before final collapse.
          
          This is not to say deserving or worth is no longer important to me but it is no longer impediment to my choice of taking action. Maybe I am wrong  as I think I am always...but I shall gladly accept its repurcussion in future ...better than forsaking existence entirely .
          
          
          

Aweirdoonearth01

@Deathsloved so true. That feeling always makes you feel down.
Reply

The_Pencraft

@Deathsloved yeah it's going well. My college life is hectic too. There are going to be continuous exams. 
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The_Pencraft

Hi how are you doing? How's your college life?

Deathsloved

@The_Pencraft Hey. I have been doing fine. I hope your college is going well. As for my college life a bit hectic but I can hamdle it or will learn to soon. If you want to catch up more , do tell. Since my insta is deleted so yeah 
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8Caraphernelia8

Hey we were chosen to be a pair for the book club! I will start reading your book shortly, but don't forget to read mine too! I hope you enjoy it!

Deathsloved

@8Caraphernelia8 yeah. You can start woth infinite whims
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8Caraphernelia8

Hey! Just checking in. My reading speed can be pretty slow, so should I start now?
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Deathsloved

@8Caraphernelia8 cool. Thanks for understanding :) 
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Deathsloved

Good evening all. How are you doing? It has been quite a while since I talked to any of you

Deathsloved

@Deathsloved yes. I am doing relatively well. I hope you are doing good too. What are you doing these days? Stay safe. 
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KaliliSallow

@Deathsloved Hello and good evening back to you!
            
            It really has been awhile since you've posted and sadly I missed it yesterday. I am doing quite well. How are you? Are you taking care of yourself well? Anyway I do hope you stay safe!
            Sincerely,
            Kalili Sallow
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ChallengeCorner

Hey, congrats on winning the Sands of Time Contest. Would you be interested in submitting this story for the upcoming issue of the Tevun Krus ezine here on Wattpad? You can find this e-magazine on the @Ooorah profile. If you’re interested, you can either send us the story to the wpooorah@gmail.com address or contact @jinnis for more details.
          All the best with your writing!

ChallengeCorner

@Deathsloved thank you so much! Looking forward to it!
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Deathsloved

@ChallengeCorner Hey! Thank you so much. Yes, I would be interested. I will send it to mail soon
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Deathsloved

It is a little weird and also relieving to think that nearly half of my life is over in simply discovering and mulling over morality so down bad. But then again, I suppose having conscience with high rate of burden and guilt is far better than having no remorse and detached one.
          
          I am also taking a good break to put my IWTCE (Infinite Whims: The Conditional Existence) in right perspective. There are far too many plot developments to pan out and characters to explore which i am sure to miss if I do anything on it right now.
          
          If this story is done right, it could potentially become the Art that defined my existence regardless of how I am to be judged before the Divine