@Doctor_Kaiser i may not know what happened and i dont wish to dig deeper in your personal life due to privacy , but If you struggle with something, and feel the need to apologize remember, theres nothing to apologize for your a good person at heart and should focus on being happy, us readers should feel sorry for how you feel, hope you keep your chin up and are pushing through , remember feelings don't control you, you control them, and you sound more then mature to do so to have them free without controlling you (hope i got my point across, If not my deepest apologies, as English isn't my first language i can struggle expressing my points like this)